Hothead or Hotbed or huh?

One of the interesting features of Global Warming is the choosing of which CAMP you want to be in....is it a hotbed of information or are you a hothead just causing problems or do you simply not give a flying f..k?

THE CAMPS

CAMP A....GLOBAL WARMING IS REAL
CAMP B....GLOBAL WARMING WILL DESTROY MANKIND
CAMP C....GLOBAL WARMING MEANS MORE BEACH DAYS
CAMP D....GLOBAL WARMING WAS CREATED BY AL GORE
CAMP E....GLOBAL WARMING WILL END SNOWBOARDING
CAMP F....GLOBAL WARMING IS A PLOT CREATED BY THE BUILDERS OF

STONEHEDGE JUST TO CONFUSE US

CAMP G....GLOBAL WARMING IS NOT A REPUBLICAN PROBLEM
CAMP H....GLOBAL WARMING IS NOT TRUE AND WE ARE AGAINST IT

As I encounter the different sides to this issue I am continuously amazed that Al Gore is front and center in Camp H. The camp against Global Warming is the camp that says they wouldn't believe anything Al Gore says....because "remember he claimed to have started the Internet." The camp against Global Warming says the charts and figures are created to only show one side of the issue....and the camp against Global Warming says that it's simply a cyclical occurrence and all the fuss is fabricated in order to.....make us nervous...and take our minds off of serious issues....like???????

That's one of the most amazing facts about Camp H. What do they think all these scientists are doing? Do they honestly believe the research being done is done to distract us from reality.
I get very nervous when a group of people seems not to be interested in a problem because the problem is being revealed by AL GORE.

As I watched INCONVENIENT TRUTH I fully understood why Al lost the election...oh wait a minute, he didn't lose the election.....oh yeah the Electoral College does count....oh yeah forget about Florida....HE LOST....get over it!

But watching the movie I realized the problem right after I fell asleep for two minutes during his lecture. Keep in mind that I am a member of CAMP A so I went to see the movie the first week it opened. The moment I realized that I had dozed off, was the moment I understood what had happened in the election.

Al, throughout his political life, has been consistent in his environmental concerns except when he ran for President. I'm fairly certain I never heard him speak about Global Warming when he ran for President. It should have been his platform issue. I realize that he might have put people to sleep but everybody needs to sleep before they can wake up.

In certain Camps, information about Global Warming makes the brain shut down....and it's possible that the brain shutting down might occur in every CAMP at one point or another.

THE INFORMATION IS INTENSE

INTENSE INFORMATION CAN CAUSE THE CONSCIOUS BRAIN TO SHUT DOWN

SLEEP IS A HIGHLY COMMON METHOD FOR EXPERIENCING CONSCIOUS BRAIN SHUT DOWN

AL GORE CAN CREATE A CONSCIOUS BRAIN SHUT DOWN IN SOMEONE BELONGING TO CAMP A


Imagine what he does for people in CAMP H?

I appreciate all the efforts Al Gore has made to bring this issue to the forefront....but if the issue is going to be taken seriously, there needs to be a member of CAMP H involved in a highly publicized conversion to CAMP A...

LET'S PICK OUR POISON.......

JOHN McCAIN.......HIGHLY UNLIKELY BECAUSE OF HIS AGE BUT HE IS SOMEWHAT VOCAL ABOUT REDUCING CARBON EMISSIONS....AND IF HE REALLY WANTS TO BE PRESIDENT, GOD ONLY KNOWS WHAT HE'LL SAY TO GET ELECTED. HE'S NOT A MEMBER OF CAMP H, BUT HE'S CLOSE ENOUGH.

NEWT GINGRICH....PERFECT CANDIDATE BECAUSE WHEN HE CREATED HIS CONTRACT WITH AMERICA....THE WORD ENVIRONMENT WASN'T EVEN LISTED IN THE 25 PROMISES. HE COULD BE THE ONE, BUT FIRST HE'D HAVE TO GET HIS HEAD OUT OF HIS ASS.

RUDY GIULIANI...I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE HE STANDS ON ANYTHING EXCEPT COURAGEOUS FIREMEN IN NEW YORK...SO HE MIGHT BE A PERFECT VOICE FROM CAMP H....BUT HE COULD BE A MEMBER OF ANY CAMP, BECAUSE NOBODY HAS A CLUE TO WHAT HIS POLITICS ARE....YET. WHAT A GREAT WAY TO ENTER THE RACE.....
A GLOBAL WARMING PLATFORM COULD PROPEL HIM STRAIGHT TO PENNSYLVANIA AVENUE.

CLINT EASTWOOD AND ARNOLD...NOW WE ARE TALKING.

Could you imagine what would happen if these two converted to CAMP A.....

OH MY GOD.....

30% OF THE PEOPLE WOULD STOP DRIVING THEIR CARS AND START RIDING DIESEL POWERED BUSES. 10% OF THE PEOPLE WOULD START RIDING BIKES TO WORK.

AND BY THE WAY....THIS ISSUE IS THE ISSUE THAT COULD SAVE FORD MOTOR CORPORATION.

THEY LOST $5.6 BILLION LAST QUARTER

IF THEY ANNOUNCED THAT EVERY PASSENGER CAR MANUFACTURED BY FORD WOULD BE A HYBRID BY THE YEAR 2010....the trucks would take a while longer.....but what they needed from the American public would be FUTURE PURCHASE ORDERS...WITH DEPOSITS....NOW. The sooner the FPO the better the discount on the hybrid.

FORD MOTOR CORPORATION COULD BE THE ULTIMATE CAMP A CONVERSION...AND WILLIAM FORD COULD ONCE AGAIN BE THE PRIMARY NAME IN THE AUTOMOTIVE INDUSTRY.

Let Clint and Arnold act as the spokesmen for the project and Global Warming gets bitch slapped all over the place....wham!

So far we've had Al Gore carrying the torch.....nice guy....Tennessee gentleman.....important political ansetory.....ex-Vice-President...founder of the Internet.....but he can put you to sleep even on your best day.....

NOW WE NEED TO BRING OUT THE BIG DOGS WITH THEIR BIG GUNS.....and lots of BIG DOGS belong to CAMP H....and for some ungodly reason people would pay attention.

ACTORS REALLY HAVE A SPECIAL PLACE IN THE HEARTS AND MINDS OF THE AMERICAN PUBLIC....

EXCEPT ACTORS WHOSE NAMES ARE ROBBINS, SARANDON, PENN, BALDWIN AND FONDA. It seems that they just piss people off...and this issue can't be pissing people off. Let them stick to their ANTI-WAR position.....there seems to be plenty of those issues to keep them busy for awhile.....

I sincerely hope that a CAMP H convert can come forth soon and take some of the pressure off of poor Al.

COME ON YOU CAMP H DICKHEADS........GET ON THE FREAKIN BANDWAGON.

A tad bit harsh?

How about...

Dear Camp H Global Warming non-believers,
Please note the importance regarding the polar ice cap melting and realize that your children's children will really have a problem if the issue is not addressed now. Al Gore promises to stop giving lectures if anyone of you steps forward and picks up the slack.
Sincerely,
The Human Race


Michael Timothy McAlevey

Blindfolded Mr. Ed

Front page LA TIMES headline;

Religious cult targeted in fierce battle near Najaf

DUH!

Apparently a cult named Heaven’s Army, led by Dhyaa Abdul-Zahra, was either attacked or thwarted by Iraq and U.S troops as it prepared to bring about the apocalypse, and the now legendary moment…. “the end of time.”

THE END OF TIME….THE END GAME…..THE FINAL BATTLE….

Today Dhyaa Abdul-Zahra is standing before “The Greeter” and being asked the question that all new religious fanatic arrivals are asked, when they arrive at the gates of heaven…..”What the f..k were you thinking?” Today Dhyaa Abdul-Zahra is defending his position by saying….” George Bush believes in the end game.” The Greeter will look at him and simply say….”I’ll be asking him the same question…..but not today.”

A religious cult has been causing the problems in Iraq….and all along I just thought it was a battle over who controlled the oil. I admit to being rather foolish when it comes to observations of this nature. Our leaders have always projected the idea that they know things we don’t know, and therefore we should just trust them.

“What the f..k are we thinking?”

It’s like thinking you can win the lottery if you are an Anglo American. The lottery seems to be reserved for Hispanics and Asians.

CHESTERFIELD, Mo. - A World War II veteran and his family stepped forward Monday to claim a Powerball jackpot worth more than a quarter-billion dollars, one of the largest single-ticket lottery prizes in U.S. history.

An Anglo-American family announced today that they were giving all of their winnings to the Heaven’s Army cult in Najaf. They claim they are followers of Dhyaa Abdul-Zahra and to honor his passing they want his followers to be able to continue his work. The money will be spent on trying to find a new messiah. It could take years to locate a new leader and people are being encouraged to submit their applications. All applications can be done on line at;

http://www.weneedanewidiot.com/

The Powerball Lottery announced ten minutes later that no Anglo-American will be allowed to play the lottery…ever again.


Cults in Iraq……what’s next? Maybe we should cut back on the plans to build that Baghdad Disneyland until we make sure there are no more fanatic religious zealots in the region. We should be able to clear up that matter in…let’s say….a million freakin years!

What the f..k are we thinking? What the f..k is anybody thinking?”

It’s very interesting that I hesitate to spell the work f..k….after all it’s not like this is some national publication that will be read by millions of religious conservatives. I think back to the trouble Lenny Bruce created when he used the word on stage. Was that a 100 years ago? All that effort to make people loosen up regarding words and I’m still having issues over writing the word…f..k.


HALLANDALE BEACH, Fla. - A Florida race track is honoring Barbaro by establishing a scholarship in his name.

The principles at Gulfstream Park announced that any horse alive can apply for the scholarship. They simply need to be able to duplicate Mr. Ed’s talent in order to receive the money. It’s been a very long process of trying to find another talking horse but the people at Gulfstream Park think that this scholarship will help. If no horses apply for the scholarship, the funds will be used to aid in the search for a new messiah to lead the Heaven’s Army cult in Iraq.

The owners of Barbaro have insisted that the rumors he would be used for finger snacks at the Dubai Race Course…are completely false….and they wanted to reassure everyone that Barbaro did not have Mr. Ed’s ability. The $25 million dollar insurance policy will be paid shortly to the family…who insisted that they really wanted to keep him alive, crippled and in pain. I wonder if they called in Dr. Kevorkian to help in the process….he’s out of prison, isn’t he? The surviving family members of Barbaro also made it perfectly clear, “ that no money would be spent to find a new messiah for the Heaven’s Army, and that they couldn’t give a rat’s ass….unless of course the rat could win the Kentucky Derby.”

The story in the LA TIMES about the cult was accompanied by a photograph that showed followers sitting on the ground, surrounded by American and Iraqi forces. They are sitting on the ground without physical restrains on their arms or legs. The one method of restraint that appears to be present is the legendary restraint known as……the blindfold.

I’ve always wondered about the blindfold when it comes to capturing Muslims. It seems to be the one thing that keeps them quiet. What I never realized was that the blindfold prevented them from running or hitting. I imagine the Rand Corporation has probably done a study on this but the media has truly failed to explain the process of the blindfold.

Do Muslims have visionary powers that we aren’t allowed to know about? Do they have some type of interconnecting vision heat generating talent….that doesn’t work through cloth? I will say one thing about their clothing. They do have a nice color sense even if they actually have no common sense. I hope we don’t see the blindfold style pop up in the new Gap ads. I know Armani would never sink that low, but Gap’s been having some problems and this could bring them back.

“THE GAP BLINDFOLD…hundreds of different colors designed from the banks of the Tigris and Euphrates River famous cult know as the Heaven’s Army.”

Contrary to earlier reports……

Soldiers of Christ and the Heaven’s Army are proud to announce that further attempts to help bring about the end of the world should be directed towards a family in Chesterfield, Missouri. They are fairly certain that the end is not imminent and in fact they claim that today is the beginning of a wonderful new world….a world created from a small tiny slip of paper containing six magic numbers. Talk about nanotechnology……yeah baby! No blindfolds needed in that family.

But honestly and seriously speaking for a moment……does anyone know about THE BLINDFOLD situation when capturing Muslims…..and is it just when capturing Muslims?

You’ll have to excuse me for a minute I think I’m getting an e-mail from a horse in Montana….

Michael Timothy McAlevey

I Keep Forgetting

There will be so many interesting dates this year. Fun to look at and fun to say …one two seven two thousand and seven….….maybe not the most fun you’ll have today but just a little hint of fun can be ok.

I keep forgetting to mention….The Dixie Chicks are very cool…and that whole incident with Toby Keith and GW was quite a deal. It doesn’t appear to have damaged their career as much as some people said it would….and I wonder if it damaged it at all. I was watching a video last night…”I’m not ready to make nice.” ….and to be truthful it might be one of the best songs they’ve ever done. I don’t have any idea what the song is about but of course I can make some wild guesses.

Now that some time has passed and GW’s approval rate seems to be moving down the charts…The Dixie Chicks stand on the war might turn out to be a beginning of the complaints. If you think back to when they “popped off”…there wasn’t a lot of ANTI-WAR hoopla, and in fact they might have been one of the first musical groups to stand up and say…..ENOUGH.

I won’t say celebrities….because there have always been actors and actresses that have been vocal against the war…as there always should be. Faces seem to garner mass interest and the obligation that goes with facial recognition hopefully will center on issues that are important to the development of a loving society.

“A loving society”……I really don’t know where that came from….must have slipped out of the 60’s recesses of my frontal lobe…but now that it has arrived on the scene….….let’s deal with it.

A LOVING SOCIETY

Is that a goal that we wish to pursue? Is that the ultimate desire of people who think along the terms of....“community?” Is it a term or an idea that means anything in the face of our War on Terror?

When we tell our children that we want them to be happy….do we ever tell them we want them to be more loving? Do we just assume that the goal of being more loving is understood?

Is the concept of having a more loving society….a concept intended only for drug induced music festivals that happened a long time ago?

Was it the backbone of the PEACE movement in the 60’s and early 70’s? Is it no longer politically correct to say that what I want is……


……a more LOVING SOCIETY

When you say the term…..”A Loving Society”……..do you snicker….or giggle…or just think…what a goofy thought?

I think the Dixie Chicks sponsor the idea of having a more
Loving Society
And they do it without backing down.

They let us know
About their glow
And even after their peers
Said
cancel the show

They didn’t change their minds about what they thought
Even in the face of all that Western rot
They had a much larger scene they wanted us to see
They wanted only to have
a more
LOVING SOCIETY

It’s so obvious
It’s so clear
For the Dixie Chicks
I stand
And
Cheer.


Plus besides being people who want a more “loving society”…..they are
HOT CHICKS.

And I have always promoted a world where it’s a very good thing to have more and
more….

Hot chicks.

It’s just one of the benefits from having a more…..

“Loving Society”

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder…and if the beholder sponsors a more loving society than soon… more and more faces will become more and more pleasant to look at…..and the more pleasant things to look at….the more we will experience what it means to have a….

Loving Society……..


And that’s what I came up with when I finally remembered to write something about the Dixie Chicks.

It’s like the coolest Hallmark Thank You Card ever written.

Peaced

Michael Timothy McAlevey

Rally Time

This Saturday at the National Mall in Washington D.C., and other major cities, there will be an ANTI-WAR rally. The main participants at the Washington rally will be Jesse Jackson, Dennis Kucinich, Jane Fonda, Danny Glover, Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins.

Leslie Cagan, national coordinator for United for Peace and Justice, claims "this will be one of the largest demonstrations since the war began." The estimate at this moment is in the hundreds of thousands.

The term ANTI-WAR has created an interesting dilemma with the American people. Almost everyone that supports the Iraq situation say's the same two things...

"We can't just leave...it will be a blood bath."

"We support our troops fully...and nothing can happen like when they came home from Viet-Nam."

THOSE ARE THE TWO ISSUES THAT SEEM TO PREVENT A LARGE PORTION OF THE POPULATION FROM COMING FORTH AND SAYING....."ENOUGH."

It's time to put those issues to rest.

The American public will never treat soldiers the same way they did during the Viet-Nam war. There are so many reasons, but one reason is that the American people learned a valuable lesson from that experience. Soldiers are following orders and doing their job. An ANTI-WAR person might tell someone not to be a soldier but once that decision has been made then it's just another American doing a job. The BOSS is accountable for the job that a soldier does....THE BOSS IS THE PROBLEM....not the soldier.

The other concern about leaving behind a blood bath. Again there is no way that one can compare what North Viet-Nam did to South Viet-Nam after we pulled out. The Iraq enemies are not separated by a boundary....The Shite and Sunni people are living next door to each other.

The Kurds are the only ones who are living away from the problem and as far as I can tell they really don't want anything to do with the Southern part of Iraq.

They will be some blood shed after we leave....due to the simple fact that for 1400 years these two sides have been bitch slapping each other...every freakin day....and that's not going to change until some clarification comes along regarding the Koran. And that's not going to happen unless Allah's voice is heard by every Iraqi at the same time.

"STOP IT.....FOOLS.....THIS WASN'T WHAT I SAID."

And since that's probably not going to happen....blood will spill between these two factions until one side simply loses. 1400 years of debating what the Koran really says....and who really should be in control. 1400 YEARS.

I realize that there are people in Iraq that don't agree with either side....but from all indications...it's only about 5% of the people....and that 5% is on a waiting list to get to America.

Keep in mind....over 50% of the population is under 25 years of age....and unemployment is very high. The gangs in Iraq make our gangs in LA look like girly men.

Which by the way.....why don't we round up the gangs in LA and send them to Iraq? Talk about fighting fire with fire....I wonder who would be more pissed about graffiti...Sunni's or Shiite's?

Back to the ANTI-WAR rally on Saturday. Looking at the list of people, I think it would be much more effective if American Idol judges were to participate.

37 million people watch American Idol.

How many of those people do you think vote?

What percentage of people watching American Idol are saying...."What war?"

At this point in time I've got to come clean and admit.....I watch American Idol. Honestly there isn't a funnier show on TV...except maybe Two and Half Men...sometimes.

The people of the United States of America have developed intense egos over the last 50 years and the unveiling of those egos takes place on Fox every week.

Of course some would say delusion has been developed, but really it's the ego that causes someone to make a fool of themselves...without realizing how foolish they are being.

And the EGO situation becomes paramount this weekend as thousands of people march against the administrations policy on Iraq.

THE EGO OF THE WHITE HOUSE

VS

THE EGO OF THE ANTI-WAR DEMONSTRATOR

Everybody is right....no one is wrong....

unless of course nobody is right and everybody is wrong...

but that couldn't be....could it?

Of course not.....after all.....on the Fox network there is that one ego maniac who, fourteen weeks from now, will stand on the stage and be named the AMERICAN IDOL.

So there must be someone involved in the Administration and someone involved in the ANTI-WAR movement who knows what they are doing....and that what they are doing is right.

Is it right for PEACE and PROSPERITY or is it right because we need the area due to its logistics to Israel and because of it's oil reserves?

THE TRUTH MATTERS.....

NOW LET'S DETERMINE WHAT THE TRUTH IS.

and we can handle the truth.....even if it's not what we want to hear.

AND THAT APPLIES TO BOTH SIDES OF THE ISSUE.

WAR MONGERS DO NOT WANT TO HEAR ABOUT PEACE

PEACE FREAKS DO NOT WANT TO HEAR ABOUT WAR

AMERICA NEEDS TO DECIDE WHICH SITUATION MAKES THE MOST SENSE FOR FUTURE OF OUR CHILDREN'S CHILDREN.

We can't stop people from wanting to hurt us....but we can stop aggression towards others...if we want to.

DO WE WANT TO?

When someone attacks us....we will respond. We always have and we always will. It only matters where we respond.

I have not heard one complaint about our involvement in Afghanistan...because we know that is where Osama Bin Laden was last seen. Obviously the natural resources of Afghanistan are nowhere near the importance of Iraq's...which means oil is much more important than heroin.....DUH!

But if we could figure out someway to convert the poppies to fuel...then we could up our ante in Afghanistan and maybe even catch that freakin asshole Obama....er, I mean Osama...

It will interesting to see the ANTI-WAR turnout tomorrow....I wonder where Hillary will be?

Probably trying to figure out why all of her husband's Hollywood friends are having parties for Osama...er, I mean Obama.

Michael Timothy McAlevey

MYSTIC vs. MYSTICAL

The American Heritage Dictionary defines Mystic as:

1) Of or pertaining to religious mysteries or occult rites and practices…2) Of or pertaining to mysticism or mystics…3) Inspiring a sense of mystery and wonder…4) Mystical (sense)…5) Mysterious…strange…One who practices or believes in mysticism or a specified form of mysticism.

The American Heritage Dictionary defines Mystical as:

1) Of or having a spiritual a reality or import that is not apparent to the intelligence
or senses…2) Of, pertaining to, or stemming from direct communion with
ultimate reality or God…3) Of or founded on objective experience: a mystical
religion…4) Mystic (sense)…5) Unintelligible: cryptic.

Obviously number four, in both definitions, creates an interchangeable situation…but when examining other parts of the definitions, I see tremendous differences between the two words.

On one hand a Mystic appears to need ritual and tools to conduct their business. On the other hand someone who is Mystical appears only to need to be Mystical…which means being spiritual in a manner not apparent to the senses.

And I would assume, when defining senses, the reference is probably aimed at “normal” senses contained in the mind of “normal” people….people who don’t have Mystical qualities, or don’t think they do.

The part of the Mystical definition that stimulates my interest the most is…..# 2.

WHEN ONE THINKS THAT THEY ARE IN COMMUNION WITH THE ULTIMATE REALITY OR GOD.

When this communion takes place….the attitude from the multitudes

changes

dramatically...

and often times drastically.

And those changes can result in opinions….and….or…..actions that could be of negative consequences to the one having communion.




The thought of an interruption while having communion with the Ultimate Reality seems like a very rude form of interruption.

Of course it is extremely important to realize that when one says they are having communion with the Ultimate Reality…it is very possible that it might not be a true communion…it might be a pretend communion, or a communion with a lesser being…on a lower level….maybe just participating in a smaller piece of toast…perhaps just a crumb…a nibble….

AND I MUST INTERJECT HERE AND SAY ONE IMPORTANT THING. NO…I AM NOT REFERRING TO ANY BEING OF EVIL NOTORIETY.

When one speaks of the Ultimate Reality, it is fairly certain that between the human experience and the Ultimate Reality experience…there are probably numerous levels of experience….with numerous types of entities…and none of them have anything to do with anything…..negative.

AT LEAST NOT IN MY MYSTICAL REALITY…

“All evil might be entirely based in human physical behavior….and if that is true…then any negative afterlife experience…would seem like excessive behavior on the part of the Creator”…..or in this instance…The Ultimate Reality.

The above quote is from my Neo-Illumination Book and was given to me by ?????????
??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????.......

So I think I can safely say….at this point in my life….that I am most definitely Mystical and have possessed Mystical qualities for many, many years.

I have never wanted to be….or thought of myself as a Mystic.

Being able to explain the Mystical experiences in my life is something I enjoy doing through my writing and my art.

When I orally tell the stories, I immediately see glassy eyes and rapid attempts for movements away from the situation….and I completely understand the hasty retreat. I much prefer to use this form of expression…so that the departure is not visible. Being Mystical, I will admit to being slightly oversensitive….which I believe is just part of the process in becoming more Mystical.






Mystics…on the other hand…probably love to tell their stories…and couldn’t care less who stops listening or leaves the situation. I think its part of their endeavor, so that remunerations can be received at the moment of the story telling.

Mystical people create books, films, poems, songs, paintings and environmental organizations.

Mystics create religions, cults, terrorist camps and Republican re-districting plans.

Mystical people are always looking for answers regarding the ongoing human evolutionary process.

Mystics are people who think that this present time is the result of all previous events and that judgments are just around the corner.

I really don’t think people who have Mystical qualities…..trust Mystics.

Of course I am basing all of this on definitions from a dictionary. I am sure that certain Mystics have an entirely different definition for both words. And I would welcome any Mystic to come forth and set me straight.

I'm dying to be set straight....as is anyone experiencing the gift of being alive.

The more I learn from Mystics….the more Mystical I will become…but I have noticed that Mystics seem to be pre-occupied with the tasks at hand…so I don’t anticipate a lot of responses….after all…it’s a lot of work to start a religion or a cult or a terrorist camp or to begin those Republican re-districting plans.

Michael Timothy McAlevey

Clubhouse thoughts

Once again, being the obedient and loving son that I am, I ALLOWED my Highlander dad to whip my ass on the golf course. This time it was only by five strokes...and I realize one shouldn't be using the term strokes when it comes to anything, either of us does....but I have an aversion to shots, so strokes it shall be. I'll probably have an aversion to strokes once I have one, but in the meantime I'll just let my dear old dad bitch slap me all over the course.

I thought I had him yesterday on the 9th hole where I picked up three strokes, when he had a little water problem. The thrill lasted about eight minutes and basically disappeared all together when I four putted the 10th hole. I actually pride myself on not three putting more than once in a round and four putting is semi-close to having a real stroke. It's not easy to four putt a green...and looking back on the moment, it's actually hard to figure out how it happened. I think my dad used some mental tool that he learned in a secret Marine division. A trick that he isn’t allowed to use unless...it’s very necessary.

Making me four putt while being down three strokes with nine holes to play, might fall under that very necessary category....when one is 87 years old.

The four putt green started a spiral and I never got close again. One of the tricks he used to distract me this time, was done in the clubhouse, before we teed off. My father has voted Republican since Teddy Roosevelt....which means twenty years before he was born he was a die hard Republican. He asked me how his granddaughter Lily was doing, and I started talking a little about how she doesn't seem to care much about politics....and that the other day I was trying to get her opinion on what she thought about Hillary running for President...and she didn't really say too much, one way or the other. My Reaganomics Republican father then spoke the words that probably caused me to four putt a few hours later.

"I like her...and if Guliani doesn't run...I'll probably vote for her. I actually like the fact that her top advisor would be an ex-President of the United States. That would seem important."

He then proceeded to say a few things about all politicians being full of crap and where's that money from the 50 cent cigarette tax in California a few years back, supported by Rob Riener. Being a smoker he really likes to bring up that tax. He also likes to point out that $5 billion has been raised and only $1 billion has been spent by the schools. He claims the money will be siphoned and used for other things.
Politicians wouldn't do anything like that....would they?

"I like her...and if Guliani doesn't run....I'll probably vote for her."

I just like writing that one more time, because I'm fairly certain it might not be true, but it is probably the only time he's ever mentioned a Democrat in the same sentence with the word vote....except for the times he said..."I'll vote for that Democrat when a monkey flies out of my ass."

"I like her....and if Guliani doesn't run....I'll probably vote for her."

It really does look and sound great and I promise never to beat my father on the golf course....even if I could....if he votes for Hillary Clinton.

How many Republicans will vote for Hillary? There has to be a high percentage of intelligent Republican women who realize that this is an historic moment for the advancement of women in this country. Forget political differences....this is a female who can actually make a life long Republican male say....

"I LIKE HER....AND IF GULIANI DOESN'T RUN...I'LL PROBABLY VOTE FOR HER."

I have to keep in mind that he might have said that just to distract me on the golf course. He knows I think about politics and he knows I support the Democratic and Green Parties....so it could have been another trick that he learned in the Marine Corps.

No matter what tricks he uses....they freakin work and once again I drive away from the golf course...just shaking my head....but this time as I leave, these magic words are running through my brain.

"I like her....and if Guliani doesn't run....I'll probably vote for her."

I've said it before and I'll say it again....the 2008 Election will be the most interesting election in the history of this young country.

Michael Timothy McAlevey

So the Pope just called.....

After reading yesterday's blog about THE NUNS I got a call today from THE VATICAN telling me to quit bitchin or they would send an entire bevy of them to my house....and they would be dressed for action.

Needless to say I am freaked out and I'm putting further comments about them....on hold.

Not to many people have weathered a battle against The Vatican....and I shall not even try....call me a coward but keep in mind I was taught about fear from the best.

One little side-bar issue.

When I was about 8 or 9 I was told that if I received Holy Communion and I had not confessed all of my sins...even if I had forgotten something by accident...that as I was walking back to my seat, my skin could turn black.

I have no idea what they told African Americans....of course the term African American didn't exist when I was 8 or 9.

Those NUNS were a hoot.
Sorry Popey.

Michael Timothy McAlevey

How have they been ignored?

The humiliation suffered by the Catholic Church regarding their Priests has been documented far beyond anything I could say at this point. What truly amazes me is that there doesn't appear to be any lawsuits against their most violent and abusive members.....

Those members of the Catholic Church known as....... THE NUNS.

I had the unfortunate experience of being taught by THE NUNS from the first grade to the 8th grade. When I recall my grammar school days I can't remember any one in particular....I only remember how they all treated me. I can only remember one name....Sister Mary Margaret....I honestly think that each one of my teachers was named Sister Mary Margaret....in fact I think every one of THE NUNS that I ever knew was called Sister Mary Margaret.....

Now I admit at this point that I might have been a little smart ass....but I was a funny smart ass and I was never a mean kid.

The truth is....THE NUNS were so mean that some time in the last twenty years the Catholic Church just simply changed their entire MO. They moved out of the convents and into apartments and stopped wearing their habits. I can't remember the last time I saw a nun walking around in public...and I believe the reason is because the Catholic Church simply figured...."out of sight...out of mind." Knowing how freakin nuts many of the Priest were, the Church knew that sooner or later men would come forward and tell stories about how THE NUNS kicked the crap out of them and made their childhoods a living hell.

I never saw them beat a girl....and I'm not about to claim they did anything sexual to the young girls...but if THE NUNS had stuck that ruler up my ass instead of whacking me across the face...I'd be lining up for a huge sexual harassment payday. And the rulers back then were made of wood and had sharp metal edges.

THE NUNS were so mean and so pissed off that the Priests never came around except during recess. And then they quickly departed after kicking a few balls around, which turns out to exactly what they really were doing....or wanting to do. Who knew?

Imagine for a few minutes...if video cell phones had existed in 1954. OH MY GOD! THE NUNS would have a had a permanent show on 60 minutes. Every week there would have been a story that topped the one the week before.

Seriously these chicks were pissed off and uptight...and every so often a young pretty one would show up, but would suddenly disappear rather quickly. When they mention statistics regarding the lost of priests in the last 30 years...they never mention the numbers regarding the lost of THE NUNS because 0 from 0 equals zero.

I realize that there must be some Orders still operating....but they really are doing it on the cuff. And these few stories I'm about to tell you...are exactly why they have disappeared...or have been morphed into at least looking like normal people.

I was in the third grade, which would have made me the ripe old age of....9. The year was 1955 and our family had just recently moved from the Hollywood Hills to a small ranch/house in Sylmar. My mother had decided one day that she wanted to start feeding and cleaning up every type of farm animal alive....after having been born in Brentwood and raised in Hollywood. Of course what she really wanted was for my brother and I to feed and clean the animals. It was a lesson she thought we needed. Today I refuse to own an animal, because between the ages of 8 and 13 I cleaned up a lifetime of excrement from the bowels of both large and small animals...and I cleaned it up every freakin day. Chickens, ducks, geese, sheep, goats, horses and
dogs. So maybe everyday when I went to school I smelled like a goat...and THE NUNS just didn't like goats...God only knows.

Anyway I matriculated from Blessed Sacrament in Hollywood to St. Ferdinand's in San Fernando.

I can't tell you if THE NUNS were the same order, because they all looked alike and had the exact same name...Sister Mary Margaret. The only memory I have from Blessed Sacrament was wearing a sign for a week. The type of sign that hung over my neck...front and back. The sign said "I am a cheat." Apparently in the second grade I peeked at some one's paper during a test....I presume that's what I did, even though I have no recollection of the incident except for the sign....oh yeah, and also I do recall a lot of young cute girls pointing at me and older boys laughing very hard.

I'm fairly certain the following incident happened in the first few months of being in my new school.

Please note that in 1955 I had no idea what a human sexual experience was or what anybody was calling it....I had seen some strange animal moments but didn't even begin to know that stuff like that was also done by human beings.

Ok....sheltered....naive....whatever....you get the point. I was innocent.

One of the first things we had to do in class was to print our name on our "things." Our things consisted of books, plastic pencil and pen holders and rulers. As I mentioned earlier, the rulers were made of wood and had a nice sharp metal edge.

One morning shortly before recess I was looking around my desk and couldn't find my ruler.
As I was bending down to look around I heard my name being called by Sister Mary Margaret...."Timothy McAlevey....is this your ruler?" I turned and looked toward the front where SMM was holding my ruler in the air with my name clearly printed on the ruler.
M C A L E V E Y. Of course I answered her immediately and said..."yes Sister I couldn't find it." She brought it down to her side and then said. "Come up here...right now." I remember her tone of voice being aggressive but in my limited experience (3 grades) every one of them seemed aggressive to me, so I didn't think too much about it, as I walked up to her platform desk. I don't know if it was an extra intimidation factor but all the classrooms had elevated platforms where THE NUNS desks would sit. As I approached SMM, standing on her elevated platform, I actually had to reach up to get the ruler, that I thought she would be handing to me. Please note one more time I was freakin nine.

As I reached up... she suddenly turned into freakin Babe Ruth and used my ruler to whack my face out of Yankee Stadium. WHACK....The sound still comes up sometimes when I'm watching TV or reading the paper....WHACK.

It's a good time to repeat my earlier statement....if she had stuck that ruler up my ass, instead of whacking me across the face....I'd be standing in line for the big pay day.....but because she was only abusive and not perverted, I am simply left with a story....to which I will now return.

The sound scared the hell out of me, but having a brother who was four years older had made me somewhat used to sudden aggressive gestures....and I don't think I started crying right away....it probably took 3 to 5 seconds before I broke down. The next thing I remember is being grabbed by the collarbone, which I think her fingers actually touched each other under the bone, and fully paralysed was led to the corner behind her desk and was pushed down and told "to face the corner and don't move an inch."

I remember sitting in the corner, on the floor, crying and wondering if the world had turned inside out and was this the end that they spoke about in Revelations. After all I was a Catholic and three years of Catholic School had drilled some major points home.

After awhile Sister Mary Margaret got relieved by another Sister Mary Margaret and off we went to the HEAD SISTER MARY MARGARET....THE PRINCIPLE'S OFFICE. I was put into a small office by myself next to the the HSMM's office....and told to sit there and be quiet. Yeah...like I'm going to respond on any level...I'm fairly certain that I was catatonic...after all I was 9 and had no idea what had just happened and couldn't even begin to wonder what had happened. I probably just sat in that little office and cried and cried and cried. The side of my face was throbbing and I couldn't even touch it without it throbbing harder.

Finally, after what seemed like a very long time, the door opened and my mom walked in. She looked at me and I'm pretty sure I saw her start crying, as she walked over and took me in her arms and held me....you know that kind of hug that only a mom can deliver. The hug helped to calm me down but all I remember saying was...."I don't know what I did wrong.....I don't know what I did wrong.....I don't what I did wrong." She calmed me down and opened the door to an empty hallway and took my hand and walked me out to the parking lot, where we got in the car and went home.

It took a few days for me to find out what caused Sister Mary Margaret to turn into Sister Asshole and when I did find out it didn't mean anything to me....I still was naive and innocent.

Two weeks later at school, after the ruler mark finally cleared up, I learned the actual truth.

The class bully, Richard, came up to me one day and said...."so I guess you got it pretty bad for writing FUCK on your ruler. Which I did by the way, and if you tell anybody I'll kick the fuck out of you."

My mother explained to me later that she had pointed out to THE NUNS that my printing of my name was obviously different than the printing of the word F U C K on the back of the ruler....and that I actually didn't even know that word yet.

Which I didn't. So what this means is....the first time I got introduced to the word fuck I got the crap slapped out of me. Definitely might explain some things in my life.....but that's another story.

I don't remember Sister Mary Margaret apologizing to me....and in fact....another incident took place a few months later that might have also been committed by her....I really don't remember because they all looked alike and all of their names were SISTER MARY MARGARET ASSHOLE.

Enough for today....tomorrow another love story from THE NUNS.

Michael Timothy McAlevey

No other word works as well

Sunday January 21, 2007

The other day I was thinking about the different levels of our judicial system.

There is the civil, the criminal and the small claims court….and now

the system has introduced Mediators and Arbitrators in an attempt

to reduce the case loads.

It occurred to me that a new division should be created….a branch devised
for the sole purpose of being able to sue somebody….for being an….asshole.

ANTI-ASSHOLE COURT.

I really believe in my heart that it’s only way to curtail the rapidly increasing
growth of the……asshole population.

Everyday each of us encounters a member of this growing segment. Some days there are numerous sightings; and every once in awhile there are days when it feels like the assholes have completely infiltrated society as we know it….

A chart could be constructed on financial remuneration based on the incident and the time frame involved. Minimum could be $250.00…Maximum could be $1000.00…with possible excessive damages being awarded for repeated offenses…..I mean really, if someone is found guilty of being an asshole more than 5 times, it’s time to take extreme measures. That would include making them attend AA…..

ASSHOLES ANONYMOUS.

"HELLO, MY NAME IS TIM……AND I’M AN ASSHOLE."

"HELLO TIM….FUCK OFF….WE’RE ALL ASSHOLES! "

Those meetings could really become the next big reality show….because one thing I’ve learned when encountering an asshole….the people who aren’t involved in the incident, but are near by… love watching it. The only thing they love watching more is if an actual fist fight breaks out…..blood always attracts larger crowds then yelling…and a fist fight actually is like a beacon for attracting more assholes.

That’s part of the fringe asshole population…..you can’t really sue the fringe assholes because there isn’t enough paper in the world to fill out that many forms.

The remuneration chart could be constructed by the different situations in which one encounters an asshole.

The different categories could be broken down into:

RETAIL ENCOUNTERS
AUTOMOTIVE ENCOUNTERS
FAMILY ENCOUNTERS
FRIEND ENCOUNTERS
LAW ENFORCEMENT ENCOUNTERS
MILITARY ENCOUNTERS

GOVERNMENT SERVICES ENCOUNTERS

CELEBRITY ENCOUNTERS
RELIGIOUS ENCOUNTERS
EDUCATION ENCOUNTERS
AND

GENERAL ENCOUNTERS….CAN’T GROUP THEM BECAUSE THEY ARE SIMPLY JUST ASSHOLES.

And within each one of these categories….there could be sub-categories…..where someone could simply get off with a warning….”if you don’t stop behaving like this I’m going to call my attorney and sue you for being an asshole."

Let’s dissect some of these categories and put remuneration values next to the infraction.

RETAIL

Why does it appear that retail clerks in department stores have literally joined an asshole union?.......and the more upscale the store, the more abundant they appear to be…and when you want to return a gift, without a receipt, it’s suddenly like an asshole convention.
I don’t want to advertise any of those stores but you all know if you have a return, for cash, at Neiman Marcus, the person you have to deal with…somehow acts like it’s their store….Take something back to Barney’s and they act like the cash is coming directly out of their pocket. Now if these type of stores have bonus incentives for anyone who is able to reduce a cash return to a merchandise credit…then the situation calls for a much higher level of asshole capitulation.

Official policies that encourage asshole behavior would fall into an entirely different category…and would have to be brought to a different level of the judicial system.

But imagine standing in front of a clerk who is simply demonstrating a obvious infraction and saying….”If you don’t stop this behavior, I’m going to call my attorney and sue you for being an asshole…..an my attorney is a real asshole.”

INFRACTION FOR BEING RETAIL CLERK ASSHOLE……$250.00

The time period involved would also determine the amount. If you get sent from one clerk to another clerk to another clerk…..then you are looking at collusion asshole behavior and a higher dollar amount could be involved.

If it takes longer than 6 weeks to receive a check from a merchandise return, then another penalty could be imposed….because you know.....there is someone in that accounting department, who’s just simply being….an asshole.

AUTOMOTIVE

There are quite a few divisions within this category…..but the first one to deal with must be centered around the common everyday driver…..it’s amazing how many times, during a day of driving, one encounters….an asshole.

The person who refuses to pull further into an intersection so that someone else might be able to make a left hand turn…..is a complete asshole.

INFRACTION FOR BEING A PREVENTOR OF MORE LEFT HAND TURNS….$250.00

The maximum fine for a driving infraction would be reserved for following type of
Incident.

Imagine driving on Highway 99 in The San Joaquin Valley….during an intense episode of the infamous Tule Fog……visibility is less than ten feet…..you are in the slow lane doing about 45 miles an hour…..you are already nervous because you’ve read about the chain reaction pile ups that happen during these fog episodes…..suddenly you hear this loud noise and an 18 wheeler goes flying past you doing about 70 miles an hour….that truck driver is a complete and utter asshole…..

INFRACTION FOR BEING THE DRIVER OF A HUGE BATTERING RAM…WHO MADE MULTIPLE PEOPLE PISS IN THEIR PANTS…..$2000.00….but good luck trying to catch that asshole…..

Because of the potential for disaster this fine would be the largest in our new judicial division…..

SHORT EXAMPLES OF DRIVING INFRACTIONS AND FINES

The motorcycle driver who decided that the freeway was a personal obstacle course….
$500.00

The bus driver who pulls away knowing someone is running towards them.
$250.00

The bus driver who just pulls into your lane without caring that you have to slam on your breaks or swerve into the other lane…..$250.00


FAMILY ENCOUNTERS

This is a very touchy category because every time you encounter an asshole in your family you can rest assured that you are actually considered a much bigger asshole.


Let’s just consider the major events that happen within a family situation.

A death takes place and division of assets becomes the immediate task.

EVERYBODY IN THE FAMILY BECOMES AN ASSHOLE.

So you get my point…..develop a new branch of the judicial system and help put a stop to the growing asshole population.


Michael Timothy McAlevey

P.s. the categories just go on and on and on and on and on……next I’ll share my Column on NUNS.....A UNIQUE BRAND OF ASSHOLES

Intro image....Uranus

The following three pages

The pages that follow are from my book, NEO-ILLUMINATION, GALAXIES and me.
The pages will be displayed throughout my blog. Seven pages have been downloaded so far.
Each page will be titled.

NEO-ILLUMINATION IS COPYRIGHTED WITH THE LIBRARY OF CONGRESS

Michael Timothy McAlevey

Neo-illumination, Galaxies and me

11th Commandment...THIS PAINTING TOOK 4 YEARS TO COMPLETE....A LITTLE BIT AT A TIME

WAR CHEST

January 20th 2007

Jerusalem- Israeli officials said Friday that they had transferred $100 million in withheld revenues to Palestinian Authority President Mahmoud Abbas.

Even though it’s only a third of what they have been withholding…it’s a step in the right direction, and any steps toward something resembling correct behavior, between these two factions, is something that should not be ignored….

Especially when it comes to money.

It never gets discussed but generally when there is a compromise between two countries over an issue….whether it be Nuclear development or pesticide control…..there is always a LARGE AMOUNT OF MONEY involved in the compromise.

If we offered IRAN $100 billion to stop their Nuclear program…they might listen. And being old school rug traders they would probably ask for $200 billion, and complete control of the Persian Gulf….to which we would say…bite me.

And since we are talking about money…the announcement came this morning that Clinton wants to be President.

CLINTON FOR PRESIDENT...has a familiar ring...don't you think?

Republicans can be heard gagging in bathrooms everywhere this morning.

On the same day that Israel is giving money to the Palestinians….Hillary Rodham Clinton formally begins her bid to become President of The United States.

Do you think she had anything to do with generosity displayed by the Israeli government?

HOW ABOUT THIS LINK

ISRAEL GIVES $100 MILLION TO PALESTINIANS, WHO IN TURN DONATE
$5 MILLION TO THE CAMPAIGN OF HILLARY RODMAN CLINTON….because Hillary promises to push the envelope for a Palestinian state.

I know about all the campaign reform issues being promoted by Congress but politicians are invincible to the self created restrictions….until they get extremely greedy or extremely stupid.

Hilary Rodman Clinton is not stupid….whether or not she is greedy can only be determined by her desire for power…which appears to be rather strong at this moment.

I have said it before and I’ll say it again….

THE 2008 PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION WILL BE ONE OF THE MOST ENTERTAINING ELECTIONS IN THE HISTORY OF OUR YOUNG COUNTRY.

Keep in mind that there have only been 43 Presidents elected…and now comes number 44.

THE 44TH PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES
IS…..????????

See what I mean……how many names popped into your head?

The TWO MAIN obvious things that will make this election entertaining are:

1)A WOMAN HAS A REAL CHANCE FOR THE FIRST TIME
2)AN AFRICAN AMERICAN HAS A REAL CHANCE FOR THE FIRST TIME

THESE ARE NOT SMALL ISSUES, NOR OR THEY ISSUES THAT CAN BE IGNORED WHEN 150 MILLION PEOPLE PLACE THEIR VOTE ON NOVEMBER 4TH 2008.

150 million!….I predict the largest single Presidential Election in our history…if the election has one of the two elements listed above….still involved.

AND THE DETERMINING FACTOR TO WHETHER OR NOT ONE OF THE TWO ELEMENTS LISTED ABOVE...WILL STILL BE INVOLVED…IS

MONEY

It won’t be a problem for the Republican candidates to raise the funds needed for the election….Republicans usually have a narrower list…and I don’t see any women or African Americans on their short list….so division of funds will not be an issue.

People with large bankrolls who belong to the Democratic Party…are going to be faced with choices that they never imagined….except of course in their drug induced dreams of the 60’s. The very liberal members of the large bankroll Democratic club are really going to pop a gasket trying to decide where they throw their investments. The liberal gay members of that club will be highly ferclumped. Again it’s one of those words that does not appear in spell check….but I’m sure you get the point.

And one must realize that when it comes to money there is a very strong contingency of liberal gay members that would love to see national policy changes.

Love is love my friend, and between consenting adults…as much as you might hate to hear it….and especially not want to visualize it…..ANYTHING GOES. ANYTHING.

And equal rights are equal rights….not rights determined to be unequal for some, who others don’t happen to accept.

GROW UP AMERICA….IT’S TIME.

And as a card carrying heterosexual who has had some visual issues with gays in the past….I’m sorry I just can’t watch two guys kiss, or anything else…but denying them the right to marry or hold a job or anything else that reeks of prejudice….is wrong.

Imagine if the Presidential Race included a gay….how about an African American cross dresser?

Now we are talking entertainment.

But let’s get back to reality for a second…..see what happens when I bring up David Geffen? Off on some wild Wizard of Oz tangent…..and where it will stop nobody knows….unless it just stops.

HILLARY RODMAN CLINTON
BARAK HUSSEIN OBAMA

There’s no way that these two could combine their talents…..is there? Now that would be an interesting ticket.

And if you think all this talk is much too early….please note the IOWA caucuses is
JANUARY 14TH 2008…..LESS THAN ONE YEAR FROM TODAY. And there was a new bill introduced yesterday in California trying to change the Primary from June 3rd to FEBRUARY 5TH. If that happens the California MONEY ISSUE becomes a huge issue in the election.

Today Hillary and Barak have the attention of well healed Democrats. The fact that the safety value, John Edwards, is also attracting some attention makes this a very interesting quagmire.

I wonder if any of the candidates will make a statement regarding the $100 million dollars being transferred from Israel to Palestine. It is probably an issue that will be avoided unless of course Jimmy Carter brings it up. But I would like to hear a prominent politician say something positive about the gesture.

All we ever hear from the Middle East is……UGLY….UGLY….UGLY. Maybe we should appoint UGLY BETTY to be our ambassador to the whole region. She’d have to wear a scarf over her face which would defeat the entire purpose of the exercise.

So many possibilities for the campaign trail…..so many beautiful possibilities.
So much money at stake.

And the fact that the political money raised to finance a Presidential bid is referred to as
A WAR CHEST….

Current and pertinent terminology ….don’t you think?

Michael Timothy McAlevey

Weekend for two

This is the most important professional football weekend of the year.
Forget the Super Bowl....that's just a bonus experience. Every year,

every team starts off with one goal....GET TO THE SUPER BOWL.

This weekend there are four teams left and all of us who are fans of

teams NOT involved in these two championship games...will watch...

maybe.

Sunday is the final round of the Bob Hope so I'll be flipping back and forth.

Obviously the sentimental favorite has to be New Orleans.

This is a huge AK event (after Katrina) and if they can leave Chicago with a victory the

country will go nuts....except for the nuts in Chicago.

Personally I think New England being an underdog, is a slap in the face.

SUPER BOWL CHAMPS 3 of the last 5 years. The Colts have a history

of NOT getting to the Super Bowl. I find it hard to believe that a man

with a first name Peyton...would be a Super Bowl hero....yoo hoo Peyton

will you cut my hair?

New England and New Orleans would be a NEW Super Bowl event.

But Chicago has an amazing defense...so I can't get too excited....actually

being a Ram fan I don't really even care.

But the city of New Orleans deserves a big treat....from my mouth to

God's ears.....and besides all those sad, sad Dallas fans should be rooting

for their waterlogged neighbors.

Michael Timothy McAlevey

And then the middle name

Over the last few weeks I have been suggesting that Barack Obama change his last name.

It's still early in the process and eliminating a name that rhymes with Osama will help his cause.

Forget the fact that he's African American because that fact can never be altered and people will just need to accept it.....but the name thing is a real problem.

Yesterday I learned that his middle name is Hussein......are you kidding me?

SERIOUSLY

BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA

it's too much to digest....and asking the American public to rise above the issues of one's race is a large task...by itself. Asking the American public to NOT think of OSAMA Bin Laden EVERY TIME they hear the name of Barack Obama is simply asking the impossible. Now I discover that every time people hear Barack Hussein Obama they will not only think of OSAMA but also SADDAM.

Just imagine someone running for President with the name of ADOLPH FITLER.

come on....it's just too much to deal with....and it's so simple to change a name.

And people would understand...but it might be too late. Probably should have made the change when he was the first black President of the Harvard Law Review. I bet he didn't name his daughters Lizzy Borden Obama and Imelda Marcos Obama.

I think the most interesting poll I've read lately was from the LA/BLOOMBERG

POLL that stated 4% of the people asked would not vote for a women and 3% would not for for an African American.

WHO IS KIDDING WHO?

SERIOUSLY....DO POLLING PEOPLE REALLY THINK THAT PEOPLE WILL ADMIT TO BEING SEXISTS, RACISTS OR JUST PLAIN...IDIOTS?

SERIOUSLY....even exit polls have no reality. A large portion of the population will not reveal their voting record....because it's their voting record and the act of voting, without being reprimanded, is perhaps one of our systems greatest assets.

The fact that only 50% of the population vote...is another entire issue....but one that might be addressed if a Woman or a African American was in the final running for President. At this point we aren't even in the quarter finals. Just a lot of talk and speculation.

Issues have not even begun to be discussed...except of course for Iraq...and at this point we are only receiving FEELERS.

"Feelers".....translate to....can financial backing be obtained?

I don't think money will be a problem for Barak or Hilary. It might be a problem for Dennis Kucinich, even though he's the only true Anti-War candidate....but being Anti-War is really not a term that American people want to hear at this time.

The 9/11 MENTALTERRIOSTSBIRDFLU is still very much apart of the nation's psyche....and the reason that GW is able to keep moving on his straight and narrow position...is because that FLU is not being cured by actions in Iraq and Afghanistan....

.....but it is the treatment being used, and the American public doesn't seem to have any alternative treatment...so let's just continue with some treatment, even though it might be the worst treatment.

Curing a national MENTALTERRIOSTSBIRDFLU will not be easy. And it will take awhile before the term Anti-War becomes something that is regarded as a higher goal to be achieved.

ANTI-WAR should be every one's goal....everywhere....all the time.

But what should be and what is....are definitely quite far apart.

When one starts using the term Anti-War, at this point in our history, one becomes Anti-American and that's a reality....and anyone who really is Anti-War...knows exactly what I'm talking about.

And it's not just unfashionable.

It's a Mentalterriostbirdflu and it is serious.

Forget intellectual capabilities for just a moment....forget treating it with normal anti- anything....

A MENTALTERRIOSTBIRDFLU can only be treated by.....time. And the problem is that when time has almost healed the dreaded flu....another incident will take place and the strain will be stronger than it is now. Once that happens...watch out IRAN, SYRIA and maybe even SAUDI ARABIA.

AMERICA DOES NOT LIKE HAVING THE FLU...BUT IT WILL USE WHATEVER MEANS POSSIBLE TO FIND A CURE....AND THE CURE SEEMS TO BE DIAMETRICALLY OPPOSED TO ANYTHING HAVING TO DO WITH THE TERM...

ANTI-WAR

So that eliminates Kucinich...and anyone else who attempts to stop the present treatment of the horrible....MENTALTERRIOSTBIRDFLU.

I'm not even sure that I'm allowed to use the term Anti-War in a blog. I have a feeling that Homeland Security will soon be knocking at my door.

Maybe when they arrive I can give them my notes on Barack Hussein Obama changing his name. Perhaps receiving information from Homeland Security will impress upon him how important this name change will be...to his higher aspirations.

By the way, as I stated in my earlier columns, the name I suggest is

BARACK CASSIUS RUSSELL.

Nice strong name with no terrorists edges....unless of course you have issues with Barack.

Come on...let the guy

keep something.

Michael Timothy McAlevey

Way beyond fighting

1-17-07

Throughout the world there are people who don't know who Muhammad Ali is...to those people I simply say.....someday you will.

Throughout the world there are people who don't like Muhammad Ali...to those people I simply say...I imagine there are lots of people that you don't like.

Throughout the world there are people who don't think Muhammad Ali was the greatest fighter who ever lived...to those people I simply say...If you ignore speed, size and power then of course you can make a case for someone else.

PUTTING THOSE THREE NEGATIVE ISSUES ASIDE I can state without question or qualm that..

MUHAMMAD ALI...formerly known as Cassius Marcellus Clay...is the single most recognizable person on the planet...and perhaps the most revered person still living.

His life transcends the sports world in ways that could fill volumes in the library. When one speaks of a sports icon it usually is used in reference to high level athletic ability directed towards a sport.

Muhammad Ali is a ICON....period.

Sports just happened to be part of the package...and of course his sport was boxing....which by the way...is boxing still around? I've been reading about some Ultimate "stuff" taking place but it doesn't seem to resemble the sport of boxing.

Those of us who have been fortunate enough to grow up with Muhammad Ali fully realize that his responsibility to mankind goes way beyond fighting.

On February 25,1964 Cassius Clay knocked out Lee Harvey Oswald, who was hiding in the body of Sonny Liston. I was 18 years old and probably smiled for the first time since November 22, of the previous year.

If one adheres to the String Theory on ANY shape or form...then one can easily connect dots that might not have been visible with normal observation. When one creates analysis of historical facts then often times the connecting dots turn into EXTREMELY THICK LINES.

Muhammad Ali, starting on 2-25-1964, would create a worldwide connection that do this day is amazingly thick and strong...even if he is not. Muhammad Ali introduced Africa to the world when he fought George Foreman. At the same time he introduced Africa to America. I remember looking at a map just to see where Zaire was...I really think it was the first time I had looked at Africa outside of a school assignment.

I don't know if there are African leaders who would admit to be motivated by Ali because everything I read about Africa is negative...but I am sure there must be.

The test of any one celebrities metal comes down to the reaction when they die. I can promise you that when Muhammad Ali dies the worldwide reaction will be unparallelled.

I'm sorry for bringing up death on one's birthday but February is approaching and those of you who know me realize that I have no choice in the matter. Those of you who don't know me will learn about February as we get closer to 2/04.

Back to yesterday and a nice memory.

Having been born and raised in Los Angeles I've had a few Ali sightings and one personal contact that I will treasure forever.

The first time I saw him was in May of 1977 at a Star Wars viewing. He sat two rows in front of me and all I remember thinking was how beautiful the color of his skin was. I had never seen a shade like that and he seemed to glow. I'm sure his celebrity status had something to do with the glowing part but as the lights went down and those words appeared on the screen....LONG AGO....FAR FAR AWAY....IN ANOTHER GALAXY....I proceeded to watch the movie with the shape of Muhammad Ali's head covering a tiny bit of the screen....right in the middle...at the very bottom.

Two years later in 1979 I was working in Hollywood at 960 N. La Brea which was the corporate office of the Aaron Brothers company. My father was in charge of the wholesale division and our offices were adjacent to the retail store on the ground floor. For those of you who don't know, Aaron Brothers is a chain of Art and Custom Framing stores throughout California. The wholesale division had nothing to do with the retail stores but our offices and the store was only separated by a wall.

One day, shortly before lunch, a retail employees rushed into my office and said, "Muhammad Ali is in the store getting something framed." I looked up and said, "Isn't his skin beautiful." The guy looked at me strangely and hurried away to tell someone else. I was very busy at the time and almost didn't go out to take a look, but it was close to lunch and my father wasn't in his office, so I decided to check him out.

As I walked into the showroom I noticed a circle of about 8 to 10 people standing around one person. As I got closer I realized that each person was handing Ali a dollar bill to be signed. He signing each bill as it got put in front of him, and he never raised his head once.

As I was watching this process I suddenly stepped up to the circle and stuck out my hand, without a bill in it, and simply said, "Mr. Ali...I would just like to shake your hand and thank you for the wonderful and exciting moments." The space/time continuum moment thing happened and he stuck out his shaking hand and raised his head and looked me straight in the eye and said, "Thank you." Although he was physically having a problem...his eyes were clear and penetrating....and yes his skin was a beautiful shade.
I swear it felt like it lasted for five minutes but in retrospect I'm sure the moment was not longer than 3 to 5 seconds.

All I know is that after I pulled my hand away he looked down and signed the rest of the bills that were being thrust in his face...and never looked up again. I stood there for a few minutes, checked him out and then went back to my office.

I wonder if those people still have those bills? I wonder if that was a standard method of autographing for him? I wonder what the largest denomination was that he ever signed?

I know I wouldn't trade that moment for any signed bill.....well, maybe a signed $10,000.00 bill... or a $10,000.00 bill not signed would be OK to trade for that memory.....is there such a bill still in circulation? I don't think so.

The bigger question is.....is Muhammad Ali still in circulation? Over the next few years, after that 1979 moment in time, I used to see him driving around town in his Maroon Bentley. Does his physical aliment still allow him to go out and get pictures framed...or see a movie? I hope so.

Today he celebrates his 65th birthday and that fact that I have had one of my all time favorite historical figures live at the same time....in the same country...in the same city....makes everything just seem....nicer. And from Louisville to Michigan to California, I am sure there are quite a few people who feel the same way.

Happy Birthday and hopefully and the Universe will allow our Strings to cross again.
Muhammad Ali's importance as a human being

is leaps and bounds....
WAY
BEYOND
FIGHTING


Michael Timothy McAlevey

Now that I've read it

A few weeks ago in one of my columns I made fun of the people who were members of the Iraq Study Group. My teasing was aimed at the age of the participants and was done on the day they released their report.

I have now read their report and before I go on, I'd like to ask a couple of small questions.

WHAT PERCENTAGE OF THE UNITED STATES POPULATION WILL ACTUALLY READ THIS REPORT?

I love asking these type of questions because the answers vary so much that one begins to question whether anybody has a clue.....to anything!

What's your quess?

My other question is.....do you think George W. Bush has read this report?

After reading the report I'm not totally convinced that anyone connected with the White House...has read the report. Maybe it's on their spring reading list.

A FEW CHOICE EXCERPTS FROM
Iraq Study Group report.

In this report, we make a number of recommendations for actions to be taken in Iraq, the
United States, and the region. Our most important recommendations call for new and enhanced diplomatic and political efforts in Iraq and the region, and a change in the primary mission of U.S. forces in Iraq that will enable the United States to begin to move its combat forces out of Iraq responsibly.


The challenges in Iraq are complex. Violence is increasing in scope and lethality. It is fed
by a Sunni Arab insurgency, Shiite militias and death squads, al Qaeda, and widespread
criminality. Sectarian conflict is the principal challenge to stability. The Iraqi people have a
democratically elected government, yet it is not adequately advancing national reconciliation, providing basic security, or delivering essential services. Pessimism is pervasive.

The United States cannot achieve its goals in the Middle East unless it deals directly with the Arab-Israeli conflict and regional instability. There must be a renewed and sustained commitment by the United States to a comprehensive Arab-Israeli peace on all fronts: Lebanon, Syria, and President Bush’s June 2002 commitment to a o-state solution for Israel and Palestine. This commitment must include direct talks with, by, and between Israel, Lebanon, Palestinians (those who accept Israel’s right to exist), and Syria.

The United States must not make an open-ended commitment to keep large numbers of American troops deployed in Iraq.



The report can be downloaded for free and techically speaking, it is not a hard read. There are no math problems and no science references....just as there is no poetry nor songs to accompany the extensive script that has been formulated.

WHAT THERE DOES SEEM TO BE.....IS.....

AN EXACT OPPOSITE OPINION TO POLICY BEING ESTABLISHED BY THE CURRENT ADMINSTRATION.

Sunday night 60 minutes presented GW for 20 minutes of one on one. During the story there was a reference to a book that George was reading. A book that was given to him by HENRY KISSINGER.

THIS IS NOT FUNNY

What was the point of having a bi-partisan STUDY GROUP if nothing was going to be heard?

One of those perfect Presidential examples of.....

"Find out everything that proves me right! If you disagree with me...we'll just ignore your Study Group and pretend it didn't even happen. My Dad had some experience in the CIA and he taught me how to orchestrate mass ignorance."

THIS ISN'T FUNNY!

BUT IT IS IRONIC AND I suppose IRONIC CAN BE FUNNY IF THE PERSON DELIVERING THE BIT....IS A FUNNY GUY.

The problem seems to be that our President might be a funny guy who just can't figure out how to deliever the bit.

I sure realize one important thing.....

HE'S NOT USING THE WRITERS THAT WERE HIRED BY THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA TO HELP HIM.....DELIEVER THE BIT.

THE IRAQ STUDY GROUP IS BEING DISMISSED AS
WRONG IN THEIR EVALUATION....

Read the report and discover for yourself what it says.

Maybe you are one of those special people who don't want to learn something that disagrees with your opinion?

WELCOME TO THE GEORGE W. BUSH WORLD OF POLICY MAKING

Michael Timothy McAlevey