OH MY ALLAH

The other day I noticed a blurb in the paper about a teacher in the Sudan who named a teddy bear Muhammad. She, a teacher from England, apparently got into some trouble because naming an inanimate object is against the Islamic religion. It's perfectly ok to give the name Muhammad to every third child born in the world....but name one stuffed animal and you are in deep trouble.

I didn't think much about it because they said officials were meeting to determine her fate and I just assumed that once the issue was addressed by officials that everything would sort itself out.

WRONG!

This morning I wake up and read that she has been sentenced to 15 days in jail and when released she will be deported.

Then I come into my office to write a short article about Teddy Bears and Allah and I see the following story on-line.

KHARTOUM, Sudan - Thousands of Sudanese, many armed with clubs and knives, rallied Friday in a central square and demanded the execution of a British teacher convicted of insulting Islam for allowing her students to name a teddy bear "Muhammad."

In response to the demonstration, teacher Gillian Gibbons was moved from the women's prison near Khartoum to a secret location for her safety, her lawyer said.
The protesters streamed out of mosques after Friday sermons, as pickup trucks with loudspeakers blared messages against Gibbons, who was sentenced Thursday to 15 days in prison and deportation. She avoided the more serious punishment of 40 lashes.
They massed in central Martyrs Square outside the presidential palace, where hundreds of riot police were deployed. They did not try to stop the rally, which lasted about an hour.

The fact that she is being deported might be the greatest single thing that has ever happened to her in her life. Now if she can just avoid the lynch mob for the next 15 days.

I think people in certain parts of the world have too much free time on their hands. Having the ability to deal with free time takes a certain type of talent....and it's a talent that might have not been learned in a country where thousands of people riot in the streets over a teddy bear being named Muhammad.

The f--ked up part of this story is that there will be some people who read this article and side with the protesters

and within that group of people there could actually be one or two wacko's who decided that I no longer deserve to live because of my smart mouth.

That's the part about the Islamic faith that really makes me think that perhaps there is no reasonable solution to their desire to convert the entire planet to Islam.

I realize that the Catholic Church once had this quest and yet it seems that reasonable solutions were reached and an attitude was adopted that stated...

"win a few....lose a few." (Which in the quest for religious converts should be the only logo allowed)

Islam needs to adopt that type of attitude....or....there is going to be a very large confrontation between people who don't care what you name anything and people who seem to think differently about what can be named.

Simple sides can be drawn for that confrontation.

Do you give a flying f..k what someone names their teddy bear?

or

Do you think that executing someone is the proper behavior for naming a teddy bear "Muhammad?"

THAT'S THE QUESTION

SO LET'S DIVIDE THE WORLD UP WITH THOSE TWO SIDES AND THEN SETTLE THIS BULLS--T ONCE AND FOR ALL.

Oh...it just occurred to me that maybe W and the Dick are already doing that...

The world stage is really heating up and to think that a Teddy Bear named Muhammad could be the straw that broke the camel's back.......wow.

And I was always sure it would be the issue of oil or water that pushed the final botton.....but a Teddy Bear???????

Don't those people over there know that there's a very important football game tomorrow?

They must not have cable.

There sure as hell don't have any commen sense....

so Gillian Gibbons needs to count her blessings and get the hell out of Dodge. I will say a few prayers that she survives the next 15 days and the car ride to the airport.

I wonder if they will let her take "Muhammad" home to England?

Praise be to Allah......

and I sure hope they don't find out about my Teddy Bear named....

GODISLOVE but don't call me Muhammad.

Michael Timothy McAlevey

POP SENSIBILITIES

November 28, 2007
Yesterday they shut off my cable because someone came to their office and told them they were moving into my apartment. The cable company, Time Warner, told me that the culprits had a copy of a lease with my address.

I’ve heard horror stories about Time Warner but this is my first experience.

I’m now sitting here waiting for the cable guy to show up and reconnect me to the world. The main loss is my Internet High Speed Access.

Last night I sat down twice to find information and both times had forgotten that I was UNPLUGGED.

I am without e-mail for the first time in a long time.

One of the positive results of not having cable or Internet was watching a Midnight Special DVD from old shows in the 70’s. I watched Fleetwood Mac do one song and remembered why every guy in America wanted to have sex with Stevie Nicks.

Then this morning I read a review by Robert Hilburn in the LA Times on Kurt Cobain UNPLUGGED. A new DVD has been released and after reading the review I really want to watch the show.
Mr. Hilburn hit the nail on the head when he talked about Nirvana then and how those of us in our 30 and 40’s simply rejected the grunge scene from Seattle. My son loved the band but I didn’t get it.

The fact that Kurt died within 3 months of my son always seemed ironic to me but it never made me want to readdress the music issue.

I think I can now address the issue of what Kurt Cobain meant to the youth of that time….and perhaps garner some greater knowledge of what and why my son was such a huge Nirvana fan.

It always seemed like a lot of angry screaming to me……but perhaps I’m ready for that genre. I have noticed a lot of people telling me to be quiet lately and lower my voice.

I think I’m going to ignore those people and start talking even louder.

People who know me……will probably say…..”How much louder can he get?”

Let’s find out…..bring on KURT and let’s up the ante…….

*********

I had dinner last night with a friend who plays in a ROCK band called ADAM DARLING. He plays the keyboard and we got around to discussing his personal music. I think he has great POP SENSIBILITIES and maybe he doesn't quite know how talented he is. There's the other side to this coin that I perhaps don't know what I'm talking about.

I associate all music with the ability to dance. And when I watch a band play and no one is dancing I wonder what happened.

That's where POP SENSIBILITIES come into play. Somehow he has to interject his POP SENSIBILITIES into the band and then they might take the endeavor to the next level. I'm not currently sure where the next level is in rock music but I still know what makes me want to dance.....and sing.

Ryan Gruzen wrote a song about 5 years ago called...RAZZLE ME, DAZZLE ME that I think fills the entire chart for having POP SENSIBILITIES and I can't wait to hear it done with a band.

IT WILL HAPPEN.

But for now I'm going to watch KURT and try to understand what made him the icon that he is.....

Michael Timothy McAlevey

STRANGE and sorry

Article from this morning's LA TIMES....by Paul Richards

RICE NAMES ADVISOR ON MIDEAST TALKS

A day after Israeli and Palestinian leaders agreed to start peace talks, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice on Wednesday named a high-level advisor to help guide the Bush administration through thorny security issues that could hobble the negotiations.

Retired Marine Gen. James L. Jones, a former NATO commander and lone survivor of the Jonestown massacre will serve as a special envoy to deal with a broad range of Palestinian and Israeli issues.

General Jim Jones states that if they can't agree on anything then kool-aid will be served before lunch and negotiations will be terminated immediately.

For those of you reading this story who are too young to remember Jim Jones....I personally apologise for bringing it up but people my age have to deal with memories that sometimes just don't fit in the ENCHANTED Disney genre.

I can't imagine how people my father's age make any sense of some of the news.

Jim Jones as an advisor to peace talks between Israeli and Palestine....

I'm sorry..... but it's just too goofy to ignore.

And the picture above of Huey, Dewey and Louie.....with Louie explaining to Huey and Dewey how and why Jim Jones will be assigned to their peace talks. Of course knowing Louie he's probably talking about a catfish he caught while on vacation in Crawford, Texas.

I realize that it's not a big deal but Al Gore did spend 40 minutes with Louie the other day and Global Warming was the main topic of conversation. And Thursday the Bush administration announced that carbon emissions were down for the first time since 2001. The problem is that measurements that matter are usually done in decades but good news is good news and I'll take it wherever it falls.

*********

What's up with the teenagers in France? I'm trying to follow the story but I don't seem to understand the problem. It can't be Muslim related, can it? I would appreciate comments from anyone who has a better handle on that situation. I have mixed emotions about France and I don't want to step on or elevate up any part of the situation without more knowledge.

I'm trying to deal with the reality of USC moving to the Rose Bowl and leaving the Coliseum....so pissed off French teenagers just aren't a big story to me.

USC LEAVING THE COLISEUM

Next, you are going to tell me that the Rams are leaving and then the Raiders are leaving and.....oh wait a sec.....maybe the COLISEUM COMMISSION has hospitality issues. Maybe the COLISEUM COMMISSION thinks they can find another football team.....to replace a team that lives about 30 seconds away.

Somebody on that COMMISSION has got to recognize that control of the Coliseum needs to be surrendered to the last tenant they will ever get. The NFL will never play football in the Coliseum again. THE OLYMPICS will probably never be held in the Coliseum again....at least not for 24 to 36 years from now. BILLY GRAHAM cannot fill up the Coliseum on a weekly basis and probably can't fill it one Sunday in a year. Maybe it could be turned into a nine hold 3-par golf course but too much cement can ruin your clubs.

WAKE UP COLISEUM COMMISSION and give the Trojans want they want. After all they said they would pay for any of the upgrades and believe me....they've got the scratch......because they've got LUCAS, SPEILBERG AND O.J.

Speaking of O.J.

Has anybody noticed how strange the new O.J. situation is at USC.

They have a freshman basketball player who will probably only play one season before going to the pro's......as a first round draft choice (he is that good).

He wears number 32. Now for those of who you are too young to remember the other O.J. when he played football at USC....I'm sorry I brought it up. But O.J. the Heisman Trophy winner wore number 32.

NOW ANOTHER O.J. AT USC WEARING NUMBER 32.......

my question is.....did someone do this on purpose in order to create a new emphasis for a number that once once regarded as arguably the greatest number in USC football history.

And I know it's hard to take because of O.J.'s behavior but truthfully he was probably one of the greatest running backs in the history of college football.....if not the greatest.

And I realize that this topic is not brought up very often but my memories of his football abilities do not diminish just because he seems to have developed anti-social behavior patterns in his later years.

ANTI-SOCIAL BEHAVIOR PATTERNS.....is legally all I say because the court system found him innocent....and the United States legal system is the system we go by....so until further proof I'll have to refer to his antics as ANTI-SOCIAL BEHAVIOR PATTERNS.....but let's go back to the number thing for a second.

32 worn by the new O.J.????? Is it on purpose? Did he wear it in High School? Was he named after O.J.??????? Does he have a girlfriend named Nicole? How strange is this story?

The closer they get to the NCAA playoffs...the more my questions will be answered. Both UCLA and USC have very good basketball teams and it should prove to be an interesting cross town rivalry this year....but at the moment there seems to be something else in the air....something that matters more than basketball....

THE BIG GAME

And there are cities and towns all across this country who are waiting nervously for their BIG GAME to start but we are in LA LA LAND and we own the BIG GAME.....no matter what anyone says....WE'VE GOT THE GAME, even though people in Missouri and Oklahoma have a rather large event......and now it seems that USC's contract with the Coliseum is up after this game so there is slight possibility that everybody gets to go to the Rose Bowl....no matter what happens on Saturday.

Thursday is a very long day in the waiting process.

But knowing that Jim Jones is helping with the security issues at the Peace talks takes my mind off the waiting game.....and gives me fuel to write silly articles like the one you've just read.

Sorry

Michael Timothy McAlevey

BIG GAME WEEK

Today marks the beginning of the last regular season week in College football.

College football is actually a week long event at most schools, but this week at most schools the week takes on a religious feeling.

It appears that this College Football season might have been one of the stranger seasons on record.

The UPSETS were staggering and fans from weaker football schools found themselves involved in moments that might never happen again.

It started the first week with Appalachian State beating Michigan and then midway through the season Stanford beat USC....and it's still a toss up on which upset was bigger.

Obviously Stanford beating USC was bigger because USC was numero uno at the time and Stanford was ranked right behind College of the Sequoias.

The only Division I football team without a loss resides in Hawaii....and they play Washington in their final game and that will probably end their perfect season. They do have an amazing program. June Jones likes to see his QB's throw the ball around 70 times in a game so entertainment is the name of that hula....and they have a quarterback named Colt so that's another notch in their lei.

Texas also has a QB named Colt and that's just a fun fact.

It's no secret that I root for USC and it's no secret that last year's result against UCLA still sticks in my throat. USC was on their way to the NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP GAME and FUCLA stopped them cold 13-9. The fact that FUCLA held USC to 9 points might be one of the stranger things I've ever seen.

Hopefully that game is also stuck in the throats of USC players.....and hopefully they will be able to shallow this week and make sure another fiasco doesn't take place.

USC is a 18 point favorite and being that this is the year of UPSETS.....I'm nervous.

But all over this country there are college football fans who simply can't wait for Saturday.

From Ohio to Florida to Berkeley to Oklahoma to Georgia to Norte Dame.....

well maybe not Norte Dame......not only do they not have a season ending rivalry....they barely had a season and I'm sure they would just like 2007 to slip quietly into the woodwork....and would like it if Mr. Weis just disappeared.

........to Oregon to Alabama to Louisiana to Idaho to Michigan to Kansas to Missouri....and every small town in between....

THIS IS THE WEEK THAT EVERY COLLEGE FOOTBALL FAN WANTS THE WEEK TO GO BY IN THE FLASH OF AN EYE....LICKITY SPLIT....

IT MIGHT BE THE ONLY WEEK WHERE TAKING LIFE ONE DAY AT A TIME....TRULY SUCKS.

MONDAY SLOW
TUESDAY SLOW
WEDNESDAY SLOWER
THURSDAY ALMOST 48 HOURS LONG
FRIDAY FEELS LIKE THREE DAYS UNTIL AROUND 5 PM AND THEN IT STARTS ROCKING.

COLLEGE FOOTBALL GAMES OF THIS MAGNITUDE ACTUALLY START AS THE SUN GOES DOWN THE NIGHT BEFORE THE GAME.

Of course there are some schools that really know how to party and right now on Monday morning there are fraternity boys that don't look at this as a week but as the day before the game.

Grade point averages will probably fall by 2 or 3 decimals this week....and classes will experience numerous open seats. Of course there are always some professors who don't realize that football programs pay some of their salaries and they just don't get what all the hoopla is about.

Those teachers are probably having affairs with the football players girlfriends so it's probably a wash.

Cynical?.....
Who me?
No way.....it's just flat out old fashion.....

Jealousy

I wish I was back in the classroom....checking out the babes and looking forward to Saturday's big game.

OH....except for the classroom....I guess I'm in the same space.....but there really are more babes in the classroom to check out. In fact that might be one of the greatest reasons for going to school.....besides the education dealio.....

Maybe I'll drift down to the USC campus and see if there are any girls with a deep grandfather fetish.

Maybe I'll get my self arrested and then call Pete Carroll for bail money.

Maybe UCLA will beat USC again....

Maybe some weird stuff will happen but most likely not.

I don't normally do this kind of thing but here goes....

USC 35 UCLA 14 or 3 or 0

What a week.....ultimate nonsense.

Best of luck to whoever you cheer for and if you don't cheer for anyone in particular, then I would appreciate a little love for the Trojans.

Have a good quick week

Michael Timothy McAlevey

MR.MARTIN

Steve Martin has just released a book entitled....

"Born Standing Up: A Comic's Life."

Apparently the memoir is focused on his childhood and what drove him to the comedic life. I say apparently because I have not read it. The review of the book by Erika Schickel in this morning's LA TIMES caught my attention and after reading the review I can safely say....



IF YOU WEREN'T THERE YOU REALLY HAVE NO IDEA.


And I'm not referring to his childhood but instead to the time period between 1971 and 1976 and more specifically to a time period in 1973 when he appeared at the Boarding House in San Francisco.


I have a slight time frame problem with things that happened between 1971 and 1976...so I think the Boarding House experience took place in 1973 but it might have been 1974.


It was at least three years before he appeared on Saturday Night Live, which in turn was two years before "The Jerk" was released.


The reviewer uses the terms AUDIODIDACTICISM and DISCIPLINE as the keys to his success.


Before I scurry off to the dictionary I would like to interject a slightly less intellectual opinion regarding his humor.


IT WAS F..KING FUNNY.

And I just looked up the word AUDIODIDACTICISM and it isn't in my New World Dictionary and that just means Mr. Martin is still creating cutting edge material....even if it's only through a reviewer.

I always attributed musical acts as being responsible for helping to qualm a rather pissed off American public between 1969 and 1973. There were quite a few reasons at the time to be angry and those of us who experienced it... can fully attest to that statement.

Those of you who are too young to have seen it in person, can only read about it, or see films about it...or listen to friends and family who will actually talk about it.

I have noticed, over the years, a huge amount of denial from people who lived through that time period and I don't really object to their ignoring reactions because... sometimes...somethings... are just better left in the storage area of the garage in
our minds.

BUT sometimes it is very important to visit that area and pull out the elements and the AUDIODIDACTICISMS that moved us in certain directions and caused us to either be relaxed.....
or at the very least caused us to accept the ramifications of our actions and thoughts....and get on with our lives.

As I said before I always attributed musicians as being the ones who helped qualm the generation that was fighting against the Nixonian ideology. I now realize that perhaps one man, without music (even though he could play a bad ass banjo) might have been equally as responsible as any musical group.

STEVE MARTIN took the art of comedy to a different level during his Boarding House appearances in or around 1973 and 1974.

I've actually tried to do some historic research on the time frame and can't seem to pin it down.

Of course Mr. Martin knows the dates and times and perhaps in his new book he mentions the performances at the Boarding House....so maybe I will go out and buy it just to help sort out some fairly amazing hazy years of my life.

I didn't really settle down until 1977. And it's just a coincidence that my settling down coincided with Steve's release of the "Let's Get Small" comedy album...which propelled him to the next echelon of American Comedic Genius status.

When he performed at the Boarding House it transcended humor. His persona was so user friendly that nobody in the audience thought they were at a show.

We all thought we were at a permanent family outing and that it would never end.

THIS OBSERVATION IS SIMPLY BASED ON THE ACTUAL FACT THAT NO ONE WOULD LEAVE THE ROOM AT THE END OF HIS SHOW. THERE WERE ONLY 300 PEOPLE IN THE ROOM BUT THERE WAS NO WAY THE EVENING COULD END BECAUSE WE WEREN'T AT A SHOW......WE WERE AT HOME WITH A GUY WHO COULD NOT POSSIBLY.... NOT BE RELATED TO US.

STEVE MARTIN WAS A FAMILY MEMBER AND EVERYONE IN THAT AUDIENCE WAS SUDDENLY RELATED....

AND WE WEREN'T GOING HOME WITHOUT HIM.

The people who worked at the club couldn't get anybody to leave the room and after about ten minutes Mr. Martin came back and basically asked "what the hell were we doing?"

The collective answer from 300 people can be summarized with this statement.

"WE NOW LIVE WITH YOU AND WHERE EVER YOU GO....WE GO WITH YOU."

At that point I think he might have realized that the entire audience was on acid or a cult was forming...and the genius of his personality took over and he simply walked down into the audience and said....

"come on....let's go....time to leave....follow me....how are you....come on."

AND EVERYBODY FOLLOWED HIM OUTSIDE AND OVER THE NEXT 25 MINUTES HE SOMEHOW CONVINCED PEOPLE TO GO HOME....

IN THAT 25 MINUTES HE PROCEEDED TO INTERACT WITH PEOPLE DRIVING CARS ON BUSH STREET.

Being a good Scot-Irish party goer who never liked to leave parties until the very end....I was one of the very last people to give up the concept that Steve Martin was a member of my family.

If somebody had been there from the government that night they could have signed up 300 people to change their names to MARTIN.

Of course the celebrities in the crowd might have been immune to the AUDIODIDACTICISMS being performed by Mr. Martin, but I saw a few of them still standing around in the street.

They probably got to hang with him and were just waiting for the nut cases (yours truly) to get on the highway and out of Steve's bubble.

Now, it's important for you to know that I didn't get arrested for refusing to leave but that perhaps my lysergic level dropped and I simply accepted the reality that I wasn't a Martin by birth....and I went home....dazed and confused but exhilarated by what I had seen.

THAT PERFORMANCE WAS THE FIRST NIGHT OF HIS ENGAGEMENT.

I have no idea how many time Steve Martin performed at the Boarding House
except for the four nights in a row that I saw him.

EVERY NIGHT THAT WEEK I TOOK A FEW MORE PEOPLE TO SEE HIM AND EVERY NIGHT HE HAD THE SAME PROBLEM AT THE END OF HIS SHOW.

NOBODY WANTED TO GO HOME AND EACH NIGHT HE HAD TO TAKE PEOPLE OUTSIDE AND PERFORM IN THE STREET....BEFORE WE WOULD LEAVE.

I THINK IF HE WERE TOO BE ASKED ABOUT THAT TIME PERIOD HE MIGHT GET A BIT SCARED BECAUSE HE HAD MENTAL AND PHYSICAL CONTROL OF 300 PEOPLE AND HE COULD HAVE TAKEN US TO JIM JONES'S HOUSE FOR KOOL AID.

OF COURSE THAT LAST STATEMENT IS A LITTLE OVER THE TOP BUT I'M TRYING TO IMPRESS UPON YOU THAT SOME PART OF ME UNDERSTANDS WHEN SOMEONE BECOMES A MEMBER OF A CULT OR A RELIGION.

Of course it's important to note that belonging to a Steve Martin led cult could prove to be one of the more entertaining things I could do.

SIGN ME FREAKIN UP!

I now can't think about that time period now without totally understanding that STEVE MARTIN calmed me down....not music.

STEVE MARTIN MADE ME LAUGH AT MYSELF

STEVE MARTIN MADE ME LAUGH AT NIXONIAN BULLS..T

STEVE MARTIN MADE ME GET OVER THE EVENTS OF 1963 IN DALLAS, 1968 IN MOBILE ALABAMA AND 1968 AT THE BILTMORE HOTEL

STEVE MARTIN was responsible for many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many many people.......getting on with their lives.

I really appreciate that fact, but a small part of me wishes I was sitting in the Boarding House next to John Denver waiting for a guy in a white suit to rock my world....and to do it without music ( even though he could play a bad ass banjo)

Thanks Steve for the great AUDIODIDACTICISMS.......it's some of the best AUDIODIDACTICISMS that I have ever seen...... and as soon as I can find out what the hell it means....

I might even end up doing it myself.......


HELL....I MIGHT ALREADY BE DOING IT.

Go buy his book and give the dude a little more love.....and check out his web site at
www.stevemartin.com

Michael Timothy McAlevey

THANKS

MIXED EMOTIONS on NOVEMBER 22nd.

I can't get my emotions in order....they are confused.

BECAUSE......

TODAY we remember a painful day in Dallas IN 1963

TODAY we eat a small brained fowl

TODAY we celebrate friends and family

TODAY we welcome home a family member

TODAY we celebrate the beginning process of helping to eradicate the Native American Indian.

We (Anglo-Saxon's and other various forms of white breads) didn't actually succeed in the apparent mission of total eradication and now every time we step into a Casino we are reminded of our dastardly deeds and are forced to surrender some scratch.

It's not an apology but it's a form of retribution.

Retribution can truly salvage all acts of savage behavior.

Financial retribution seems to be the most common method of helping to repair certain acts that can be considered......

INAPPROPRIATE

EVERY TIME SOME COUNTRY DOES SOMETHING THAT APPEARS TO BE SENSIBLE AND REASONABLE .....IT ALWAYS SEEMS TO FOLLOW THAT LARGE AMOUNTS OF CASH ARE HEADED THEIR WAY.

I realize that I'm appearing to be off the point of Thanksgiving but really I'm trying to create a pattern that allows for retribution to be understood.

Some people think IT'S ALWAYS ABOUT MONEY
Some people think IT'S ALWAYS ABOUT LOVE
Some people think IT'S ALWAYS ABOUT PAIN
Some people think IT'S ALWAYS ABOUT SOMEONE ELSE

I have a tendency to take the important things for granted and simply regard the people I love as people I love....and they get it and they know it and they can feel it or they don't feel it......or they share it or they don't share it.....

It ain't no big thing

But sometimes it's important to remind people how you feel and.....

Thanksgiving just might be one of those days where we ignore a lot of bulls..t and tell everyone we love them no matter what we feel and think.

I have a problem because I generally like most of the people I know. Of course there's always a few clogs in the wheel but really the tire keeps turning and the rubber meets the road and how this turned into a Meatloaf song....I have no idea.

I would just like to thank my brother for being in my life.

All my memories of my childhood and all my memories of my late mother are tied to my relationship with my brother.

All the Thanksgivings I experienced as a child are the only reason I even acknowledge this holiday.

No matter how goofy our environment might have been at times, and there where times when it rivaled Disneyland on crack, when it came time to celebrate a Holiday......MY MOM CELEBRATED WITH THE BEST OF THEM.

My brother continues that celebratory way of life and I thus live vicariously through his experiences of maintaining a somewhat normal lifestyle.

I personally maintain a modern technological form of bohemianism that can't quite be described by those who encounter it. Just one of the perks of being an artist.

Today I will go to my ex-wife's sister's house for dinner because that is where my daughter will be and because traditionally that's where I end up on Thanksgiving. It's a homecoming for Laura and that's a big deal and a reason to celebrate.....but there's some issues out there and we'll see how it carves out. I'll try to be civilized but lately stuff just pops out of my mouth.

USC plays at 5 pm so the dinner will be short and sweet.....

I'm thinking of softer times and different traditional transitions.

There have been some years where tradition changed and the Gruzen family made me feel like one of their family members and forever I will cherish those times.

We've both lost parts of our souls since the beginning of our friendship and no Thanksgivings can ever fix that.... but just remembering how special those Thanksgivings were..... makes life seem nicer.

People like Valerie Gruzen made life seem sweeter and more wonderful than it actually might be.

Of course I'm not submitting to the theory that life sucks but golly gee.....sometimes
it's
been
a
motherf..ker


OH WELL....

another day to celebrate
another day
of
living

and how this turned into a SLY AND THE FAMILY STONE song....
I have
no idea

but

at least
it got me away from the American Indian Eradication theme.....

......and it seemed to take my mind off of 1963.

So.....now

let's party

GO TROJANS

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

MICHAEL TIMOTHY MC ALEVEY

BIG TREE AND THE L E D

SMALL STORY ON PAGE A17 OF TODAY'S LA TIMES
small story with large ramifications


The Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree is going "greener" with energy-saving lights replacing old fashioned bulbs.
The 84-foot spruce will be covered with 30,000 multicolored light-emiting diodes, or LEDs, strung on five miles of wire.

THE DAILY SAVING IS EQUAL TO THE AMOUNT OF ELECTRICITY CONSUMED BY A TYPICAL 2000 SQUARE FOOT HOUSE IN A MONTH.

END OF STORY

BUT

THIS STORY IS THE TRUE BEGINNING OF A LIGHTING REVOLUTION

All the talk and all the efforts by those of us involved in trying to teach others about the world of LEDs will now seem pale compared to information that is generated from one Christmas Tree. I admit it's a rather large tree....but it's a Christmas Tree and on the night when they light the tree (Nov 28) there will be more public interest generated in LEDs than all the previous efforts put forth.

It will be televised on NBC and the next day from Iowa to Oregon to Florida to Texas....there will be people sitting around their breakfast tables talking and the husband will say...

"So, those light eating diates things.....what exactly are they and why don't we have some for our Christmas Tree? And the wife will answer with....."Christmas Tree? Why don't we have them everywhere"......and the revolution will begin.

Within a week or two reporters will be asking the questions that needed to be asked.....60 Minutes will fall in line and the Oprah will do a show on LEDs and

WHAMO....THE LIGHTING REVOLUTION IS IN FULL SWING.

AND ALL IT TOOK WAS ONE LARGE BEAUTIFUL CHRISTMAS TREE

and once again Christmas kicks ass!

I am sure that Color Kinetics got the job to light the tree but if they didn't then shame on their sales department.

Of course there will be the slight backlash on the fact that all those lights were made in China but I doubt that any reporter will dig that deep during the ceremony. It will take a few weeks for Bill Reilly or Sean Hannity to expose the China connection to the Rockefeller Christmas Tree. But by then the cat will be out of the bag and information will be screaming across this country regarding...

LEDs

or

Solid State Lighting, if you prefer.

Personally I don't give a rat's ass what you want to call it....just realize that the amount of Energy saved by switching to LED bulbs is....

IMMEDIATE......AND HUGE

and they are available to purchase right now for 75 % of all your exterior and interior lighting......EXCEPT AT YOUR LOCAL RETAILERS WHO FOR SOME REASON HAVE BEEN PREVENTED FROM SELLING LEDs BY TWO LARGE COMPANIES WHO IMPLY THAT THE TECHNOLOGY IS NOT AVAILABLE.

while buying LED companies......lock, stock and barrel.

......BUT..... GE and Philips will not be able to stop the flood and they will be forced to move early on their planned retail unveiling of LEDs. And the entire process started with one Christmas Tree....one very large Christmas Tree.

Happy Holidays

Michael Timothy McAlevey

Wrong about Alex, Right about Hillary and BIG FOOT BARRY

I was totally wrong about A Rod signing with the Angels and it took an act of God to make him stay in New York. The act of God consisted of Alex dealing directly with the Yankees without his super agent Scott Boras. Boras still gets his 10% so don't lose any sleep over his being neglected.
Alex is getting $275 million for the next 10 years with bonus money being available if he approaches Barry Bonds home run record.

I doubt whether he will be able to approach the most amazing statistic I've seen regarding the Bonds indictment.

The LA TIMES ran a comparison of Barry's stats before 1999 and from 1999 to 2007. The stats include one very strange number.

Barry Bonds in 1999 was 34 years old.....his shoe size was 10 1/2

TODAY BARRY BONDS SHOE SIZE IS 13

A seldom mentioned result of Human Growth Hormone use.

HIS FEET GREW BY 2 1/2 SIZES

THIS BLOWS MY MIND SO MUCH MORE THAN HIS LYING TO THE GRAND JURY OR BULLS..TING THE AMERICAN PUBLIC.

SOMEONE CAN WORK OUT AND CREATE MUSCLE MASS BUT I'VE NEVER HEARD ABOUT WORKOUTS TO INCREASE FOOT SIZE.

Keep in mind that he was 34 years old in 1999.....when he started getting physically bigger.

Imagine how happy and satisfied his wife must be if everything grew the same way as his feet.

No wonder he's so freakin arrogant.

Remember the old adage.....big feet......big.......

AND ON TO HILLARY

Friday night I read my fantasy Hillary speech (previous blog) to eight informed adults at a dinner party. The response was highly favorable and I received repeated suggestions to make sure that Hillary got a copy of the speech. One of the women at the table said she would vote for her just because of the speech...( I suspect she would vote for Hillary anyway)

But the most interesting thing that happened was my question regarding Hillary's sexuality. I asked this question before I read my speech.

"Yes or no...do you think Hillary is a lesbian?"

ALL EIGHT PEOPLE SAID........ NO.

No matter what anybody says about anything regarding this election....it's the innuendo's that will sink a candidate faster than anything.

THE RUMORS have more power than the facts......always have and always will.

Keep in mind that the factual information one knows about any candidate is limited based on voting records and public behavior.

Howard Dean had a incredibly successful campaign derailed by one public SHOUTING EPISODE and no innuendo's.

JOHN KERRY WAS DEFEATED BY INNUENDO'S ONLY....and some questions about his wife's accent.

THE RUMORS ABOUT HILLARY'S SEXUALITY WILL BECOME URBAN LEGEND BY THE TIME THIS ELECTION REACHES IT'S APEX.

I think she and Bill should make a video......the kind of video that made Paris Hilton a celebrity. Obviously making a sexual video doesn't destroy one's career.....

Of course it hasn't been done by a politician....but it's a new day and a new dawn and we are talking about electing a WOMAN as President of the United States so all previous bets are off the table.

It could be fuzzy and out of focus so that we wouldn't have to be visually disturbed.

It could be a preemptive strike to the RIGHT WING RUMOR MONGERS NEO-CON ATTACK on Hillary.....

AN ATTACK THAT WILL HAPPEN ...AS SURE AS SOME ONE'S FOOT INCREASES IN SIZE IF THEY TAKE HUMAN GROWTH HORMONES.

10 1/2 TO 13 at the age of 34!!!!!!!

I PERSONALLY AM NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO THE HILLARY ATTACKS BUT I'M TRYING MY BEST TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO SOFTEN THEM BEFORE THEY ARRIVE......(a love making tape of her and Bill is just my first idea. )

AND THEY WILL ARRIVE AND THEY WILL BE UGLY.....like Barry's toes....

Michael Timothy McAlevey

Alex or Hillary

I can't decide what's more important....The Dodgers getting A Rod or the country getting Hillary.
There are some problems with both scenarios.

Hillary's main problem is.....she is not Bill
Alex's main problem is Scott Boras

Scott Boras should be Hillary's agent and then everything would work fine.

Obviously if you are a Major League baseball STAR...then you want Scott Boras representing you. The problem is that it seems to be ONLY about money. And while that might sound naive I think that there has to be other considerations......

LIKE IN THIS FANTASY PRESS RELEASE

Alex Rodriquez announced today that he has decided to sign with the Los Angeles Dodgers for 10 million dollars a year. He said the chance to show Los Angeles what he was capable of went far beyond the monetary reward. He said that he has always wanted to be a Dodger.

BACK TO REALITY

Hillary is starting to create some strange ripples in her trip through Iowa. One of the strange ripples is the planted question from a member in the audience. I hate this part of politics and I would advise Hillary to cut the bulls--t before it gets out of control. It might already be out of control and the difference between her and Bill being able to deflect negativity is a vast difference.

John Edwards on the other hand is appearing Presidential. He regards himself as outside of the political main stream and whereas this might be true.....he can't be considered too far outside or he'd be in the Mike Gravel camp.

It's interesting to see some of the Democratic candidates running for the Vice-Presidency. John Edwards can't be a Vice-Presidential nominee because of.....done that/ been there.....and it didn't work. So it's either the captain of the ship or back to jury trials.

That explains why he sort of moved into an attack mode on Hillary in the last debate. It's all or nothing for him.

Bill Richardson, Christopher Dodd and believe it or not, Barack Obama might all be looking to the number two spot on the ballot.....

Barack only because it makes sense to ease America into the racial complexity of his campaign, and being Vice-President would make that adjustment...acceptable.

American doesn't like anything shoved down it's throat and strong women and smooth talking African Americans are still viewed with caution.

Having a feel for the pulse of American voters is not a fortune telling ability....it's just instinct combined with common sense and a slight knowledge of the last 50 years of Presidential races.

1960 was the first election that I remember actually having an interest in the outcome. I was 14.

In 2008 I still have an interest in the outcome and right now the outcome is IN THE AIR.

So many things can happen between now and the conventions.

Hillary has to stop acting like a robot and start acting like a chick in charge. She needs to wear a skirt once in a while....and it can be well below the knees....but she needs to remind everybody that she is a woman. She needs to get a little bit angry once in awhile......and it doesn't have to be screaming Howard Deanesque....just pissed off like women get from time to time. And then she can always apologise and be sweet.....just like women do.

LIKE IN THIS FANTASY RADIO BROADCAST

HI....this is Hillary Clinton. I know the first thing people want to know is....why did I stay with Bill when he was getting buffed out by that Monica babe? The answer is actually none of your business.....but I'm going to explain anyway.

Loyalty is a very underrated quality until it is demonstrated. I believe in my heart that Bill Clinton is my best friend....I have loved him since we were in college. He has always had numerous women around him that would like to kiss and touch him.....that's who he is....he's a cuddly teddy bear and if I were to stop loving him for that reason....I would be ignoring one of the great parts of being married to him. Last night we cuddled like there was no tomorrow. The man is incredible and I will love him until the day I die.

I would never leave him because of his weakness for other women. I do ask that he somehow try to control it and he promises me that he has gotten a lot better in the last 30 years. I believe him and I love him.

But here's the deal. I have much more important matters to solve than trying to control my stud husband. I have health care issues that concern the entire country. I have war issues that just seem to be part of the program. I have terrorist issues that are becoming almost impossible to deal with. I have civil and individual rights issues that are totally being ignored....I have immigration issues that need to be addressed. I have trade imbalances that must be brought up. I have environmental issues that might be more important than all the other issues put together.

I have a job that I want to do and I think I can do the best job of anyone currently running for President of the United States.

I am Hillary and I am not Bill....but he is my life partner and I will need him to help me through this experience. I would think that the American public would feel comfortable knowing that Bill Clinton was the last person I saw every night before I fell alseep.

Thank you and I hope you now understand a little bit of what I was feeling during that strange time in the White House. It was a very short period of time in the eight years and it should never be regarded as his legacy. His Presidency should stand on it's own.

And so should mine.

Peace

Hillary

BACK TO REALITY

A ROD WILL PROBABLY SIGN WITH THE ANGELS
and Hillary will never show her ankles.

And that's a fact.

Michael Timothy McAlevey

56 Days to Cornville

I've actually never been to Iowa ......unless of course you count having seen Field of Dreams 20 times.
If that counts then I'm a freakin expert on Iowa.
I remember walking out of that movie when it first opened and there was a long line of traffic going into the theater parking lot and for a very quick instant....very quick....I thought it was a continuation of the movie.

That last statement would indicate one of two things.

I'm either very easily fooled by showbiz people or
I'm nuts

It's your call

I still have a hard time turning that movie off if I stumble upon it. I honestly believe the speech by James Earl Jones about Baseball is one of the great moments in film. Of course I realize that it helps to love baseball but even a little bit of love for history should make that scene memorable for most people.

Of course to put everything in perspective I have the same problem turning off Tombstone.
Which puts us closer to
Iowa
where this article actually started...

I've actually never been to Iowa but I would think the 2.9 million people feel like the political future of America is in their hands...or cornfields....or hay bins....or wheat fields.
The truth is I know very little about that state....and for all I know they could be paid not to grow anything...which is also the American way.

I have a dear friend who is currently in Story City, Iowa.... trying to say goodbye to her mom who is getting ready to walk out behind center field of the the biggest ballpark.....LIFE.

It would be so cool if James Earl Jones could be the greeter.

In that James Earl Jones voice....

"WELCOME TO THE NEXT GAME.....THIS ONE LAST A BIT LONGER THAN THE LAST ONE BUT THERE'S SO MUCH MORE TO SEE."

My friend's mom was a model in France in the early 50's and then my friend became a model in New York in the late 60's and now her daughter is a model.

That's a pretty wacky gene to have.

But let's stay on some kind of point with Iowa.

There has to be a point to Iowa.......doesn't there?

Our future is riding on the shoulders of Iowaians....or Iowans....or Iowaonees...or whatever they call themselves.

And to say that our future is riding on their shoulders might not be the crazy exaggeration that it sounds like.

I don't want to sound any alarms at this point but all the Republicans are pushing for Hillary to win the nomination and that scares the crap out of me.
It's a Karl Rove plot
It's a Dick Cheney plot

They know that the boat people who sunk John Kerry have incredible resources and Hillary has given them massive amounts of information because...simply put...

SHE'S HILLARY

and being Hillary for the last 40 years has simply been one huge story after another. ....because after all....

SHE'S HILLARY

THE RUMORS ARE LARGER THAN THE STORIES AND WHEN RUMORS ARE LARGER THAN THE STORIES IT TURNS INTO....

FANTASY LAND POLITICS

FANTASY LAND POLITICS means that it doesn't matter anymore
what the truth is.....
all information becomes urban legend....
AND I' m simply afraid that Hillary has created a bigger than life persona and that bigger than life persona will result in so much negativity by election time that people will simply vote the other way just to have it over....and if people respond like that then we will have a similar situation that we currently are experiencing in the White House.

AND THAT'S WHY IOWA IS SO IMPORTANT.

ELECTABILITY IS THE KEY WORD IN POLITICS....and even though I personally would support Hillary for President....I have very little confidence in the America public being able to make that leap.

I'm sorry to say it, and God knows I wish I was wrong, but Hillary might be easier to defeat than Barack.... but both of them can be defeated in a general election.

JOHN EDWARDS WOULD NOT BE DEFEATED BY ANY REPUBLICAN CANDIDATE

AND IOWA COULD KNOCK HIM OUT OF THE PICTURE.

AND THAT'S WHY IOWA IS IMPORTANT TO THE FUTURE OF AMERICA.

And hopefully my friend's mom from Story City, Iowa is feeling some of the love and making herself comfortable with the her next Field of Dreams.....

It's going to be ok....

unless of course John Edwards finishes 3rd in Iowa......

Michael Timothy McAlevey

NICE SURPRISE

I went to see the Sean Penn's new movie, "Into the Wild" but I missed the starting time so the only movie playing was "DAN IN REAL LIFE."
I personally don't watch OFFICE so therefore I'm not a Stevel Carell fan but I was there and a movie is a movie is a movie.

I was extremely pleased that I accidentally stumbled on this small gem of a film.

When a movie has a love theme combined with a father and daughter theme....I'm easily sucked into the program. Add some hearts broken by life lost, and throw in some very well written exchanges that are poignant and funny....and the result is a wonderful experience.

When I cry and laugh in the same movie then I have truly gotten my monies worth....and this film enticed both emotions on a few different occasions.

If you like to feel good when you walk out of a film.....run to this movie.

The first response I had when the film was over was...."the writing was precise and fresh."

I had to suspend my reality check on the family structure because it was just too darn perfect.....but I suppose that jealousy could be another emotion. It really pointed out how unsuccessful I've been in my role as a father.....even though I've made a valiant effort. Those of us who are parents, but seem to have overlooked certain responsibilities, view a film where everything works in spaces...and it makes us a bit queasy.

I pretty sure it's too late to correct my lack of responsibility and my ineptitude at securing a financial and fiscal future for my daughter...but of course I'll keep trying. Being an artist creates certain problems in the responsibility genre...but it does make me want to write something that might seem important in the long run.

My scripts I have written do not contain enough humor.

I need to sit down and work on a project that reflects more of my social interaction behavior.

Being funny in real life is much easier than being funny on paper....and I have no idea why that's true.

This appears to be my serious side.

And I know that some of you who read my "articles" would say..."that's not necessarily true."

I realize I can be sarcastic when writing but being funny is another target and I shall work on that in the very near future.

I have a friend named Jack Neworth who writes for the Santa Monica Daily Press with a weekly column on Friday (Laughing Matters) and who has written numerous scripts. I have grown accustomed to his humorous style and I think he does it quite well....even though his sarcasm is evident....it doesn't dominate and therefore his style seems easy and comfortable. It would seem that he could write a script along the same lines as DAN IN REAL LIFE and that's a great compliment.

Check it out on Fridays.

And then go check out the movie.

Michael Timothy McAlevey

BEE JERRY

I'm hoping that the BEE MOVIE makes people start talking about CCD. I'd BEE rather surprised if it comes up in Jerry's animated film....but I'll have to go check it out to BEE sure.

The backlash to this type of movie might BEE that people will just giggle at anything having to do with BEEs....and that would BEE a very bad idea in regards to ignoring CCD.

I'm pretty sure that AMERICAN GANGSTER will beat the BEE MOVIE at the box office...
at least over the first weekend....and most likely in total revenue....because we know that bad guys are much more interesting than funny BEEs.

How cool would it BEE if Denzel and Russell started talking about CCD?

I'll go check out the two films and report back later on which one is more important to the health and welfare of the human species.

A funny BEE movie is better for CCD awareness than no movie at all......I think.

By the way....how weird is it that when the Dodgers sign Joe Torre the Lakers play their best game in about three years. I knew he was good but this is ridiculous.

Michael Timothy McAlevey

BILL is first LED man

I have been verbally pushing the Light Emitting Diode technology for six months and physically promoting and trying to sell LED's for the last two months. I keep wondering when someone of the celebrity genre would step forth and speak the speak. I have personally spoken to Ed Beagly Jr. about Solid State lighting and he truly seemed underwhelmed with the technology. I realized that he was promoting Fluorescent Spiral bulbs and while he admitted that yes they do contain Mercury...they were a better alternative than incandescents. I walked away from our short meeting with reinforced conspiracy theories regarding the big boys in lighting and the world of LEDs.

My conspiracy theory is based on the principle that GE and Philips have inventories in incandescent and fluorescent bulbs that probably extend into the next three years.
WHILE AT THE SAME TIME THEY ARE BUYING LED COMPANIES AND TECHNOLOGIES BUT CONVINCING POLITICIANS THAT THE TECHNOLOGY IS NOT CURRENTLY AVAILABLE....because they aren't ready. Somehow they have muzzled all voices regarding this technology...and that somehow might be related to Lobbyists and MOOLA....but of course it's just a theory....and Lobbyists can't really control politicans opinions or actions....can they?

I ADMIT THAT LED LIGHTING IS NOT PRESENTLY ABLE TO REPLACE THE BULB IN YOUR TABLE LAMP....but it's coming quite soon....maybe even by Christmas time. I saw some 360 Degree bulbs yesterday that if combined with the right optics (cover) could officially end the life of energy wasting Incandescent Edison light bulbs.

BUT.....WHAT IS CURRENTLY AVAILABLE IN SOLID STATE LIGHTING....
....AND NOT BEING PROMOTED BY GE OR PHILIPS....OR TALKED ABOUT BY ANY REPORTEDLY GREEN SPOKESPERSON....OR EVEN MENTIONED BY ALL THE WONDERFUL CELEBRITIES THAT SEEM TO BE CONCERNED ABOUT GLOBAL WARMING....OR DISCUSSED BY ANY POLITICIAN.......until yesterday....
......ARE THE TYPES OF LIGHTS LISTED BELOW.

1) DOWN LIGHTING.....TRACK LIGHTS AND SPOT LIGHTS AND FLOOD LIGHTS.

2) MOST LANDSCAPING AND ARCHITECTURAL LIGHTING

3) ALL DECORATIVE LIGHTING OF ANY SHAPE, SIZE AND FORM....INCLUDING CHRISTMAS TREE LIGHTS AND MAIL BOX LIGHTS.

4) ALL STREET LIGHTS......OF ANY COLOR

I say until yesterday....because once again....a hero steps forward and for the first time someone of IMMENSE IMPORTANCE .....MENTIONS LED LIGHTS.

WILLIAM JEFFERSON CLINTON announced yesterday that THE CLINTON CLIMATE INITIATIVE would work with WAL-MART to " examine technologies such as energy-saving LIGHT-EMITTING DIODES for street lamps and parking lots, as well as more energy-efficient building materials and heating and air-conditioning systems."

The man of the hour since 1992 is once again the man of the hour in 2007....and besides that, he got something going on in his married life that could once again change the political face of America. I'm not sure... but I've heard rumors that he's married to the next President of the United States....if' that's true then that means a woman would lead this nation. Is that possible...or just urban legend material?

I LOVE THE GUY....and because of his friendship with the former Prez I've even grown fond of George Senior.

There's no end to what Bill Clinton can achieve....and the fact that he's focused on energy saving technologies simply means that the celebrities will start falling in line on SOLID STATE LIGHTING as the quickest and easiest way to start saving energy.

FORGET THE MERCURY FILLED FLUORESCENT SPIRAL BULB...IT IS TOAST.

LIGHT-EMITTING DIODES (LEDs)
or
SOLID-STATE LIGHTING TECHNOLOGIES

are available
TODAY

NOW

AND THANKS TO BILL....the light will finally start to shine on this technology.

Come on down
AL
LEO
BOB
ED
MARTIN
and any other green celeb that moans and groans about saving energy and doesn't mention
LEDs.

Bill has paved the way.

THE PRICE IS RIGHT AND THE TIME IS

NOW

MIchael Timothy McAlevey

P.S.
If you want to know where to get them just send me an e-mail at
m1117mtm@yahoo.com