So hard to find a good laugh

I have admit that it's been harder and harder locating a good laugh. I've looked around obvious corners and searched through reliable archives but every time I get close something pops up and thwarts the giggle and prevents the laugh from taking shape.

I'm not going to point out those "things" that pop up because YOU know where to find them....and most likely they find you so don't fret the omission from today's column....but instead celebrate with me on finding a "gem of laughter" from the most unusual place.

THE SPORTS SECTION OF THE LA TIMES.

SPECIFICALLY THE SECOND PAGE OF THE SPORTS SECTION.

WHICH IS USUALLY DEVOTED TO T.J. SIMERS, WHOSE COLUMN CAN GENERATE A SMIRK OR TWO....BUT SARCASM AND IRONY DON'T GENERALLY CREATE A BELLY LAUGH....UNLESS OF COURSE SARCASM AND IRONY ARE YOUR MAJOR CUPS OF TEA.....I ENJOY SARCASM BUT IT DOESN'T MAKE ME LAUGH....AND ALTHOUGH I NOTE AND ENJOY T.J. SIMER'S ABILITIES TO MAKE FUN.....I ALSO RECOGNISE HIS NEED TO STATE THE NEGATIVE.....WHICH HE CALLS SARCASM, BUT A ROSE BY ANY OTHER NAME IS STILL.....BLAH.....BLAH....BLAH

ANYWAY BACK TO THE LAUGH

This morning I turn the page of the sports section and the headline reads......

Old Mike, new Christine

I don't want to deprive you of the same laughter potential moment so I'll simply
stop right here. Go get the paper.....find the sports section....turn to page two and remember
all the things in the world that are preventing you from being able to laugh.

The fact that I started laughing when I read the column might be an indication of many, many things.....and personally I don't give a flying f..k about those many, many things.

I would simply like to thank Mike Penner for writing such an interesting farewell.......and although the column will return.....nothing will be the same....and I mean nothing. Maybe in a few days I address the "meat" of the article but for now.......I'll just say.....thank you Mike for a very good laugh.

I needed it.

P.S. if you don't have access to Thursday's LA TIMES (4/26/07) then you either don't have a computer, you don't live in Los Angeles, you don't know what a newspaper is, you don't have the slightest idea how you even got on this blog, you don't acknowledge the sports section of any paper and last but surely not least, you don't read....anything....ever.....except cereal box names and toothpaste brands.

HAPPINESS MIGHT BE BASED ON HOW MUCH TRUTH....ONE CAN IGNORE
Neo-illumination

MICHAEL TIMOTHY MC ALEVEY

The Count of Sean Maximilian

29 years ago two nice but non-focused humans were given a gift of life. The fact that the gift would be returned might seem cruel to certain people and while some will look at this as a sad day while remembering Sean Maximilian McAlevey.....I on the other hand.... can only remember the amount of incredible moments I enjoyed from watching and knowing him.

When you lose a child at the age of 15, EVERY SINGLE MOMENT OF THAT LIFE becomes HUGE....

EVERY SINGLE MOMENT

The things that were just intented to be tiny memories as one grows old.....BECOME ASTRONOMICALLY LARGE

EVERY SINGLE THING

and after 13 years the HUGE MOMENTS AND THINGS do not turn into little moments and things....they stay LARGE

EVERY SINGLE ONE

The images I've chosen to share are just a few quick moments that I managed to capture on camera. I wish you could see how big they are in my heart.

Happy 29th Birthday Sean.

MICHAEL TIMOTHY MC ALEVEY

STILL counting

29 and STILL counting

Jesus was GOOD HUMOR man

So much information is being presented both fictionial and non-fictionial, regarding the Nag Hammadi discoveries in 1945......some of the most entertaining being the fiction mysteries woven within the historical data.

The organizations that wish not to have their selected "divine works" challenged are obviously repelling anything found in 1945. Those organizations, normally defined as religions, base their core structure on works found much earlier. The fact that certain information might have been intentionally hidden or destroyed does not weigh heavily on their organizations....because why would facts have any substance when faith determines viewpoints....and beliefs.

Christianity cannot have a human Jesus. Judaism cannot have a God Jesus. Islam cannot have anything resembling a Jesus except for a nice prophet guy. Hinduism needs tons more stories and multiple gods and Buddhism needs people to look at human behavior from 2500 years ago.

As we facilitate our advancement into the next evolutionary stage of the human experience it's going to require the ultimate mental and spiritual re-birth. And it's a re-birth that has nothing to do with any of the above mentioned organizations.

In fact looking at the word re-birth I realize that it might be one of God's great jokes....

REBIRTH
REB IRTH
RIB EARTH

HOW'S THIS FOR FUNNY?

GOD DECIDES TO RIB THE INHABITANTS OF EARTH BY ALLOWING ALL ABSTRACT SPIRITUAL INFORMATION( AND PLEASE NOTE THAT ALL SPIRITUAL INFORMATION BY ITS VERY NATURE..... IS....ABSTRACT) TO BE ADJUSTABLE TO TIME FRAMES, LOCATIONS AND ATTITUDES.....AND WITHIN THOSE ALLOWANCES DECIDES TO JUST WATCH HOW THE ASSIMILATION TAKES PLACE.

THIS REALLY TAKES ON A NEW PERSPECTIVE IF INDEED ALL SOULS GO TO HEAVEN.

WHICH CANNOT BE REPUDIATED BY ANY PHYSICAL BEING ON THE PLANET.

BUT WHICH IS ABSOLUTELY DENIED BY EACH AND EVERY ORGANIZED RELIGION ON THE PLANET....AND THE DENIAL IS BASED ON THE DIVINE WORKS THAT ARE THE CORNERSTONE OF EACH GROUP.

THE DOCUMENTS FOUND IN 1945, IN THE DESERT OF EGYPT, NEAR THE TOWN OF NAG HAMMADI COULD HAVE BEEN PLANTED IN 1944 OR 1034 OR 756 OR 207 or..........

THE FACT THAT WE READ SOMETHING FROM ANY ERA WHEN THE MAJORITY OF PEOPLE DIDN'T READ OR WRITE IS ACTUALLY QUITE FUNNY.

WHAT WE ARE DOING IS REWARDING THE INTELLIGENTSIA OF THE SPECIFIC TIME PERIOD AND SWEARING THAT WHAT THEY SAY IS "DIVINE" BECAUSE most people were TOTAL IDIOTS, SO ANY ACTS OF INTELLIGENCE...LIKE READING AND WRITING, MUST BE THE ULTIMATE TRUTH.

IT REALLY IS FUNNY
AND
ONCE AGAIN

GOD PROVES THAT DIVINE HUMOR IS THE HIGHEST FORM OF HUMOR....BECAUSE SO MANY PEOPLE
THINK
IT'S
REALLY
REALLY
SERIOUS.

AND THAT'S
REALLY
REALLY
FUNNY.

and the next evolutionary stage of mankind is starting to see through that humor, and while having a good laugh, is starting to ask some serious questions.

But "divine humor" will be hard to overcome.....because how the heaven can one tell what might be funny to the Creator of the Universe.

THAT'S SOME HIGH LEVEL HUMOR

and we need to elevate quite a bit to see what's so freakin funny....but that might be our
job

LET'S TRY HARDER TO GET THE HUMOR SO WE CAN START TO SHARE THE JOKE WITH EACH OTHER.

IT'S A FUNNY WORLD
OR
IT'S
NOT

and I choose the former.

I'm also looking for current "divine humor" instead of very old "divine humor" and maybe you should be looking for the exact same thing.

Stop putting so much emphasis on yesterday's
rules and regulations....especially on rules and regulations established by organizations that have spiritual abstract ideas that form the basis of their groups.

LOOK FOR NEW METHODS, BECAUSE THE OLD ONES SEEM TO BE CAUSING A LOT OF STRESS THROUGHOUT THE WORLD.....and most of the people can't seem to get the freakin joke.

MICHAEL TIMOTHY MC ALEVEY

TESLA WITHOUT THE VOLTAGE

Nikola Tesla would have not been able to envision the LED LIGHT because it takes very little energy to create the LED light and Nicky baby was into big time wattage. ....and large surges of electricity.

A light-emitting diode (LED) is a semiconductor device that emits incoherent narrow-spectrum light when electrically biased in the forward direction of the P-n junction. This effect is a form of electroluminescence. LEDs are small extended sources with extra optics added to the chip, which emit a complex intensity spatial distribution [1]. The color of the emitted light depends on the composition and condition of the semiconducting material used, and can be infrared, visible or near-ultraviolet.

THE DEVICE EXPLAINED ABOVE IS THE QUICKEST PATH TO SAVING ENERGY.

Each and every person can dump their energy consuming incandescent light bulbs and install LED LIGHTS and start to save 90% of what they have been spending on lights.

THE INITIAL COST OF THE LED BULB IS EXTREMELY HIGH COMPARED TO A STANDARD LIGHT BULB.

THE LIFE SPAN OF AN LED LIGHT AND THE COST OF ENERGY USED NOT ONLY OFFSET THE COST DIFFERENCE BUT SAVE LARGE AMOUNTS OF MONEY IN THE LONG RUN.

LED LIGHTS USE 90% LESS ENERGY

THE LED LIGHT IS SO GREEN THAT THE EDISON COMPANY WILL HELP PAY FOR THE CONVERSION ON COMMERCIAL INSTALLATIONS.

HUNDREDS OF AIRPORTS HAVE ALREADY CONVERTED THEIR RUNWAY LIGHTS TO LED

THE FUTURE IS NOW

and Tesla would have been proud even without the jolts that he enjoyed generating....and he really did like to make noise with his light shows.

LED LIGHTS ARE THE NEW NOISE WHEN IT COMES

TO THINKING AND ACTING

GREEN

TIME TO WALK THE WALK

SHUT OFF THAT SILLY ANTIQUE FILAMENT APPRENTICE AND TURN ON THE FUTURE

CONVERT TO LED

IT IS A GREEN STATEMENT THAT ANYONE CAN MAKE....TODAY!

LED LIGHTS ARE THE NEXT GENERATION AND

THEY ARE AVAILABLE

NOW

ENERGY LITE IS THE COMPANY THAT BRIGHTENS UP YOUR FUTURE

213-400-0504

WRITE YOUR CONGRESSMAN, YOUR GOV, YOUR PRESIDENT, YOUR UNCLES AND AUNTS

TIME TO TURN ON THE REAL LIGHT

LED leads the way to a green future....and the future

is

now

MICHAEL TIMOTHY MC ALEVEY

LIMBO ELIMINATED and BEES DON"T CELL

The Catholic Church made a giant stride into reality based awareness by eliminating the concept of Limbo....which is the place that babies would go if they died before being baptised. Fairly harsh place.....caught between HERE and THERE....between THIS and THAT.....trapped forever in the Middle of NOWHERE....with millions of other babies. I sure would hate to be the NANNY ANGEL on that location.
Purgatory should be the next target. Purgatory....which is the detention area before being allowed to advance to the honors class of heaven. Those who are sent to Purgatory can be there for a very long time depending on their infractions.

THE ARROGANCE OF ANY PHYSICAL BEING....OR WORSE YET, ANY PHYSICAL ORGANIZATION.... CLAIMING TO KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENS TO THE INDIVIDUAL SOUL AFTER IT LEAVES THE PHYSICAL BODY IS AN ARROGANCE OF HUGE PROPORTION AND THOSE PEOPLE AND THEIR ORGANIZATIONS ARE TRAPPED IN A TRUE LIMBO OF IGNORANCE.

I think about the devout Catholics who have suffered for years after losing a baby, and have had to also deal with the ridiculous notion that the soul of their baby has been stuck in Limbo.

Which I'm pretty sure was invented by one of the wacky Popes in the 7, 8, 9 or 10th Century....and believe me when I use the term wacky, I'm probably being extremely gentle.

COMPLETE NUT CASES might be a better category to place SOME of those leaders. But they knew how to scare the heaven out of people and they knew how to train their flocks.

THE FACT THAT YESTERDAY THE CATHOLIC CHURCH ELIMINATED LIMBO SHOULD OPEN THE DOOR FOR OTHER RELIGIONS TO STEP FORWARD AND DROP CERTAIN "IDEAS."

HOW ABOUT A TRADE OFF......A TIT FOR TAT.....A BARTER AMONG BELIEF THIEVES.

CATHOLICS GIVE UP LIMBO
ISLAM GIVES UP THE 72 VIRGIN DEALIO

SOUNDS FAIR AND REASONABLE TO ME......AND THEN MAYBE WE COULD EVEN GET OTHER ORGANIZATIONS INVOLVED.

CATHOLICS GIVE UP LIMBO
ISLAM GIVES UP THE VIRGIN THING
JUDAISM GIVES UP......TAKE YOUR PICK......PERSONALLY I THINK THE PARTING OF THE RED SEA MIGHT HAVE TO GO....OR MAYBE THE COUPLE THAT WAS TURNED TO STONE FOR LOOKING BACK AT S AND G.
HINDUISM GIVES UP....AGAIN TAKE YOUR PICK....LOT'S OF WILD THINGS TO ELIMINATE IN THAT ORGANIZATION.....that doesn't consider itself an organization.
BUDDHISM GIVES UP.......I'M NOT SURE WHAT THEY NEED TO GIVE UP.... BECAUSE I'M NOT THAT FAMILIAR WITH THEIR ORIGINS AND THEY SEEM TO BE FOCUSED ON ????????

I'LL LOOK INTO THAT ORGANIZATION AND REPORT BACK but THERE'S ANOTHER STORY THAT CAUGHT MY EYE THIS WEEK.

THE COLONY COLLAPSE DISORDER MIGHT BE THE RESULT OF CELL PHONES.
Apparently the signals from cell phones creates havoc for the bee population. The signals cause the bees to become disorientated and they can't find their way home.....the fly around until they starve and then they die.

THIS THEORY WAS NOT WIDELY REPORTED BUT IF IT TURNS OUT TO BE ONE OF THE PROBLEMS THAT BEES HAVE.....THEN IT'S PRETTY SAFE TO SAY.....BEES ARE SCREWED.

NO WAY ARE PEOPLE GOING TO GIVE UP THE CELL PHONES IN ORDER TO PRESERVE POLLINATION.

OF COURSE THEY MIGHT GIVE UP THEIR CELL PHONES BUT IT WILL ONLY HAPPEN AFTER IT IS MUCH TOO LATE....AND ALL THE BEES HAVE VANISHED DUE TO AN OVER ABUNDANCE OF PEOPLE TEXT MESSAGING THEIR VOTE INTO THE AMERICAN IDOL SHOW.

I wonder if the Bees stopped over in Limbo before heading out to BEEHEAVEN?

MICHAEL TIMOTHY MC ALEVEY

AND WHILE THE WORLD BLAZES INSANE

NEW YORK - Wall Street bounded higher Friday, hurtling the Dow Jones industrial average to a record close approaching 13,000 as investors celebrated a week of surprisingly strong earnings reports. The major indexes all had their third straight winning week, their longest such streak since October.

The Dow closed up 153.35, or 1.20 percent, at 12,961.98, after setting a new intraday high of 12,966.29. The blue chip index — now about 38 points shy of 13,000 — has hit 34 record closes since the beginning of October last year.

Google gave a boost to technology stocks after it reported late Thursday a 69 percent jump in first-quarter profit to exceed analyst expectations. The results helped reassure some investors who had grown cautious about tech growth, and sent Google up $10.83, or 2.3 percent, to $482.48

The three paragraphs above are part of a AP news story. The following paragraphs a part of an MTM news story.

NBC had it's first ratings win in well over five years by deciding to broadcast the last words and testament of the craziest person to ever attend college. The families of his victims have had NBC removed from their cable tier packages.

NBC ANNOUNCED TODAY THAT IT WAS CHANGING IT'S NAME TO FOXY TWO.

The face of the craziest person to ever attend college (whose name will never appear in my writing).....will replace the Peacock symbol.

Media pundits across the country actually said they understood. "The pressure on NBC, because of being fourth in the network ratings, was simply too much to bare," said someone somewhere. "Something drastic had to happen, and thank God that crazy freakin idiot wasn't a black man....or even weirder....a black woman. With all the fuzz over Imus NBC wouldn't have been able to make this type of bold move." NBC justified its behavior by reminding everybody that 38 million people paid to text message their votes on American Idol. Fox responded by saying something that sounded like........raspberries......or.....na na na na na na.

Google announced that it would buy NBC in a few weeks once their audience falls to.......zero.

The NBC spiral started a few years ago when Aaron Sorkin was removed from WEST WING.....nothing has been the same since. The latest programming fiasco is the handling of Aaron Sorkin's new show...STUDIO 60. Some big shot thought that it would be a good idea to replace it with an IRISH SOPRANO insane show with teenagers playing Tony Soprano.

THE IDEA OF REPLACING AN INTELLECTUAL VEHICLE (STUDIO 60) WITH A VIOLENT EXPOSE (THE BLACK DONNELLYS)IS ALL PART OF THE NEW NBC PROGRAMMING DIRECTION.....THE DIRECTION THAT WILL ULTIMATELY LEAD TO ZERO VIEWERS AND THE NEW OWNERSHIP BY GOOGLE.

Someones going to discover that last weekend the craziest person to ever attend college sat through five repeated showings of Grindhouse....and actually thought he was still in the freakin movie.

I saw Grindhouse yesterday and I just want to thank Rodriquez and Tarintino for the wonderful images that are streaming through my mind.

ALL OF THIS NEWS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE FACT THAT TODAY IS 4:20 Who's smoking what where....GOD ONLY KNOWS.

AND THE FACT THAT IT'S ADOLPH HITLER'S BIRTHDAY MAKES IT ALL A BETTER REASON TO SMOKE A LITTLE GANJA.

The strangest thing about 4:20 is that I had never heard of it....and rumor has it that it started at San Rafael High school in 1971.....the year I moved to Marin County.

A day to celebrate the smoking of pot.....wow.....like someone needed a special reason.

LIGHT IT UP!

THIS REALLY HAS BEEN A CRAZY WEEK AND SMOKING A LITTLE POT MIGHT NOT BE SUCH A BAD IDEA.

I CAN TELL YOU ONE THING......THE CRAZIEST PERSON EVER TO ATTEND COLLEGE....DID NOT SMOKE POT.

THERE SHOULD BE A MEDICAL MARIJUANA FACILITY RIGHT NEXT TO EVERY GUN STORE IN AMERICA.

BIG SIGN ON THE OUTSIDE

BEFORE YOU BUY THAT GUN WHY DON'T YOU TRY A LITTLE PURPLE KUSH?
THE FIRST ONE IS FREE
and you might not need a gun after trying our product.

"SMOKE THIS INSTEAD" could be the new slogan across the country.

Of course there is a certain type of individual that uses medical marijuana and then goes next store to the gun shop and spends four hours at the shooting range.

THAT TYPE OF INDIVIDUAL IS AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT PROBLEM....AND PROBABLY NO ONE WE HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT GOING CRAZY ON A CAMPUS. THAT TYPE OF PERSON THINKS A CAMPUS IS A PLACE TO GO CAMPING WITH A BUNCH OF US.

THIS REALLY HAS BEEN A CRAZY WEEK AND IT'S SO NICE TO SEE THE STOCK MARKET NOT BE AFFECTED BY THE INSANITY.

Somehow Paul Wolfowitz has figured out how to manipulate the market so that it completely overshadows anything he might have done wrong.

The man can walk on freakin water......unfortunately the water is polluted with the blood of American soldiers.

The best news about GRINDHOUSE is that in two weeks it grossed $19.8 million dollars. By comparison....when Pirates Of the Caribbean 3 opens in May...it will do $19.8 million dollars in the first 10 minutes.

Talk about a successful franchise.

Johnny Depp and Toby McGuire should switch roles and Johnny could be Spidey 4 and Toby could be Jack 2.

LIKE I SAID.......IT'S BEEN A CRAZY WEEK...MAINLY THANKS TO THE CRAZIEST PERSON WHO HAS EVER ATTENDED COLLEGE....AND THE DECISION MAKING BRAIN SURGEONS WORKING AT NBC....AND OF COURSE THROW IN SOME GRINDHOUSE EXPLOITATION CRAP AND GOOGLE MAKING ONE BILLION DOLLARS IN THE FIRST QUARTER AND 4:20 BEING A POT HOLIDAY AND THE DOW ALMOST HITTING 13,000 AS A RESULT OF ALL THE FREAKIN UPBEAT NEWS....what a week.

MICHAEL TIMOTHY MC ALEVEY

P.S. The picture of Lily and Laura is just my way of trying to offset a very crazy week.....and the picture of Reese is just another picture of Reese. This is a close as I get to stalking a celebrity.

LYRICS for EARTH DAY

I've decided to post some lyrics I wrote a few years ago. Earth Day is April 22nd. Even though I have seen three different dates listed for Earth Day, I'm pretty certain that it's this Sunday....or Saturday.
Quite strange when you start researching Earth Day. There are a few people who claim they started it. No matter who started it....it's a good idea to devote a day to thinking about our planet.
These lyrics were written to a Celtic melody written by John Doan.

THERE'S A SOUL IN THE LIFE OF THE LAND WHERE WE LIVE
IT'S CLEAR
IT'S CLEAN
IT'S FRESH
AND IT'S OURS

IT DOESN'T CARE WHERE WE'VE COME FROM
IT DOESN'T ASK WHO WE ARE
JUST
DO WE LOVE
WHERE WE STAND
AT THIS TIME

WE CAN DRINK ALL ITS WATER
AND MINE ALL ITS COAL
BUT WHEN WE MIX THE TWO TOGETHER
IT TROUBLES HER SOUL

WE CAN TEST ALL THE BOMBS
AND DESTROY EVERY LAST TREE
AND THE ONLY THING IT REALLY DOES
IS ELIMINATE YOU AND ME

THE HARM THAT WE BRING
DOESN'T BOTHER THE LAND
WE ONLY HURT OURSELVES
BY FAILING TO UNDERSTAND

THAT THERE'S A SOUL IN THE LIFE OF THE LAND WHERE WE LIVE
IT'S CLEAR
IT'S CLEAN
IT'S FRESH
AND IT'S OURS

IT DOESN'T CARE WHERE WE'VE COME FROM
IT DOESN'T ASK WHO WE ARE
JUST
DO WE LOVE
WHERE WE STAND
AT THIS TIME

WE ARE GIVEN ALL THE TREASURES
THAT ANYONE COULD USE
BUT IF WE DON'T HAVE A VISION
THEN ALL WE DO IS LOSE

WE DUMP OUR LEFTOVER PROBLEMS
IN EVERY OCEAN, RIVER AND STREAM
WE LIVE BY A CODE OF CONSUMPTION
THAT DARKENS EVERY DREAM

WE THINK THAT OIL IS OUR GOLD
BECAUSE IT MOVES MACHINES AND MAN
ALL ALL IS REALLY DOES
IS REMOVE THE SPRINGS OF LAND

WE NEED THAT SPECIAL CRUDE
BECAUSE WE'VE IGNORED OTHER WAYS
AND ALL WE'VE ENDED UP WITH
IS COUGHING THROUGH A HAZE

OUR CHILDREN'S CHILDREN
WILL REALLY PAY THE PRICE
AND JUST THAT THOUGHT ALONE
DOESN'T MAKE US VERY NICE

AND WHEN THE DUST HAS FINALLY SETTLED
AND ALL THE BILLS HAVE BEEN PAID
IT IS ONLY THE SIMPLE FACT
THAT THERE'S ONE MISTAKE WE MADE

WE THOUGHT WE CONTROLLED THE EARTH
BY DOMINATING THE LAND
AND IT SIMPLY COMES DOWN TO THAT ONE THING
THAT WE
JUST DIDN'T UNDERSTAND

THAT THERE'S A SOUL IN THE LIFE OF THE LAND WHERE WE LIVE
IT'S CLEAR
IT'S CLEAN
IT'S FRESH
AND IT'S OURS

IT DOESN'T CARE WHERE WE'VE COME FROM
IT DOESN'T ASK WHO WE ARE
JUST
DO WE LOVE
WHERE WE STAND
AT THIS TIME



HOWEVER OR WHENEVER YOU DECIDE TO ACKNOWLEDGE EARTH DAY IS NOT IMPORTANT.

THAT YOU TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR FUTURE GENERATIONS IS YOUR LEGACY AS A HUMAN BEING.

AS AN INDIVIDUAL YOU MIGHT NOT GIVE A FLYING RAT'S ASS....BUT AS A MEMBER OF THE TEAM......THERE'S A PART OF YOU THAT DOES CARE.

FIND THAT PART AND ROLL IN THAT DIRECTION

HAVE A NICE EARTH DAY

MICHAEL TIMOTHY MC ALEVEY

WHAT'S WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE

If I didn't know for sure I would say that someone "photoshopped" this picture. Look at it for a few minutes and tell me that this isn't a doctored image. The only thing weirder than that little chipmunk lady from Shrek, would be if that South Korean maniac's picture was shown. And I'm fairly certain the word maniac can be applied to someone who shoots more than 30 people.

The media was calling him a "sociopath " which is a gentle description for a person who thinks there are no rules except the rules that he or she conjures up.

I THINK I KNOW SOME SOCIOPATHS......AND MURDER WOULD BE THE LAST THING ON THEIR MIND.....WHICH IT TURNS OUT MIGHT ACTUALLY BE THE LAST THING ON THEIR MIND....ESPECIALLY THE MURDER OF THEMSELVES....but I don't think the word sociopath should be used in place of MANIAC.

Sociopath sounds like a medical diagnostic opinion.

MANIAC says it all.

Sociopath sounds like a little therapy and a few friends will make everything ok

A MANIAC IS A MANIAC.......AND THE REAL PROBLEM IS SOMEONE IN THIS MANIAC'S FAMILY KNEW SOMETHING WAS WRONG.....A LONG TIME AGO.

BUT THEN AGAIN HE COULD BE FROM A FAMILY OF MANIACS...AND THAT'S ANOTHER PROBLEM.

Now the references will be made like this......"oh...you mean that maniac's family," or "oh, you mean that maniac's girlfriend."

THIS IS ONE MANIAC WHO COULD NOT HAVE HAD A GIRLFRIEND.....

EVER

Maybe he had a date in High School....but I can promise you one thing....this MANIAC did not attend his high school prom and I'm pretty sure he never played any sports and he didn't have any hobbies like photography or stamp collecting....and I find it hard to believe that he ever read a newspaper.

I think MANIAC'S are created by the environment of their youth....which usually turns out to be the family....and mainly good old mom and dad.

I think sociopaths almost create themselves as they enter adulthood and once they find out that they can get away with "stuff" .....they enter the full world of SOCIOPATHOLGY.

BUT

from what I've witnessed in my lifetime.....sociopaths enjoy many aspects of living and often times involve themselves in sociopathological behavior in order to INCREASE some of those aspects....in other words

SOCIOPATHS ARE CRIMINALS....NOT MASS MURDERERS

MANIACS ARE MASS MURDERERS

EVERY SO OFTEN THE TWO MIGHT BLEND AND CREATE SOMEONE LIKE

ADOLPH HITLER.....but I think that's an exception to the sociopath board game.

WE ALL HAVE A SLIGHT TOUCH OF SOCIOPATHOLOGICAL BEHAVIOR WITHIN OUR NATURES.....ESPECIALLY THOSE OF US WHO LIVE IN COUNTRIES THAT PROMOTE POLITICAL AND RELIGIOUS FREEDOM.

WE DON'T ALL HAVE A SLIGHT TOUCH OF MANIACAL BEHAVIOR.....

......even though some might argue that case.

Once in awhile our behavior might seem on the edge....and once in awhile certain people that we know and love, might look at us in a way that might indicate that they think we are maniacs......but yesterday in Virginia we witnessed what a real Maniac is like, and if you examine your friends and family very closely you will discover that you might know some sociopaths but you don't really know very many.....maniacs.

And that's the moral of yesterday's tragedy.

THIS TYPE OF BEHAVIOR IS RARE.

When you realize that there are potentially 6 billion sociopaths occupying this planet....you very quickly realize that there is only a short list of maniacs.

Terrorists have increased that list quite a bit in the last twenty years but we have addressed that problem and are currently involved in A WAR ON TERROR.

THERE IS NO WAR ON MANIACS.....because that would mean arresting stupid moms and stupid dads and mean uncles and silly aunts and nasty aggressive young people at middle schools and bully's in high schools that make fun of the quiet withdrawn introverted non-athletic kid whose entire environment is in the midst of creating a....

MANIAC

I don't think I know any MANIACS

How about you?

DO YOU THINK YOU KNOW A MANIAC?

I KNOW YOU KNOW A FEW SOCIOPATHS

I feel extremely sad for the families involved in yesterday's "incident" but each and everyone of us has to think about it....although we don't feel their personal loss, we do feel the blow that has been delivered to the human experience....and most of all the blow that has been dealt to the "soul" of awareness and to the very core of our need to be loving.

MOMENTS LIKE THIS SHOULD MAKE EACH AND EVERYONE OF US STEP UP OUR DESIRE TO LOVE AND HONOR AND RESPECT OUR FAMILIES AND OUR FRIENDS

....AND THEN STOP FOR JUST A SEC AND REALIZE IT'S ALSO NECESSARY TO LOVE, HONOR AND RESPECT EACH AND EVERYBODY THAT WE ENCOUNTER.

THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO ABOUT THE PEOPLE I WILL NEVER MEET.....BUT THANK GOD I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE WORKING ON THIS PROBLEM.

IT REALLY IS A SPECIES SYNERGY THAT NEEDS TO UNFOLD....AND I THINK IT IS UNFOLDING.......

EVEN WHEN

A SINGLE LONE

MANIAC

TRIES TO FOLD THAT SYNERGY BACK INTO TOTAL

CHAOS

IT DOESN'T WORK ON ME.......AND I HOPE IT DOESN'T DISCOURAGE YOU

but I am a little concerned about the comedians that got a hold of the Supreme Court picture and inserted that character from SHREK.

weird, don't you think?

MICHAEL TIMOTHY MC ALEVEY

GUNS ARE LOUD....TODAY'S BLOG IS QUIET

A day of silence for the losses suffered by families who simply thought they had sent their children off to college.

Michael Timothy McAlevey

LOOKING FOR EXCUSES

After reading the story about Paul Wolfowitz and his lady friend, Shala Ali Riza, it's fairly clear that certain "people" are out to get Mr. Wolfie. Those certain "people" can't make him responsible for his IRAQI STRATEGY so they have decided to attack from any angle possible.

The idea of people in politics displaying favoritism towards family and friends cannot be considered abnormal and most likely it's part of their job titles. And the higher up one rises, the stronger the displays of favoritism become apparent.

THIS IS NOT SOMETHING TO FREAK OUT ABOUT....BUT BEING THE ARCHITECT FOR THE FIASCO IN IRAQ IS SOMETHING TO FREAK OUT ABOUT.....BUT MR. WOLFOWITZ REFUSES TO DISCUSS IRAQ BY SIMPLY STATING...."I HAVE ENOUGH TO CONCERN MYSELF IN AFRICA.... I DON'T WANT TO DILUTE MY ENERGY WITH THE SITUATION IN IRAQ."

PAUL WOLFOWITZ HAS VERY LARGE B...S.

I 'VE STATED THIS BEFORE ....BUT.... HERE GOES ONE MORE TIME

THE PARALLELS WITH WOLFOWITZ AND ROBERT McNAMARA, UNDER RICHARD NIXON, ARE STAGGERING.

RENT "THE FOG OF WAR" AND YOU WILL SEE MY POINT.

THE SIMILARITIES ARE BEYOND COMPREHENSION.

The only element missing from Robert is the girl friend scandal....but sex wasn't really an issue back in those days......when the media seemed to bury that type of behavior.

********************

BY THE WAY....IF YOU AREN'T FINISHED WITH YOUR TAXES....YOU HAVE UNTIL TOMORROW TO FILE AN EXTENSION....ANYTHING MUST BE POSTMARKED BY THE 17TH OF APRIL.

********************
BACK ON POINT....
Paul states quite matter of fact that he will not resign. I wonder if he's actually bigger than the WORLD BANK.

And I'm wondering if his chick is related to any sheik or warlord? That represents another problem....

PLEASE RENT THE MOVIE......THE FOG OF WAR.

DO IT NOW.....TODAY

MICHAEL TIMOTHY MC ALEVEY

OFF TO COLLEGE IN HER NEW CAR

It's offiCAL........

Yesterday while standing on her grandfather's Hall of Fame plaque at USC....LAURA E. FAIRLY announced that she had made a decision and THE UNIVERSITY AT CALIFORNIA BERKELEY was her destination as well as her destiny.

It was a very strange day on the Trojan campus.

First....it was the day after a SIT-IN DEMONSTRATION had been thwarted by strong arm administrators....who decided the best way to battle students who didn't want clothes sold in the bookstore that had been made in sweat-shops around the world......was to call their mommies and daddies and threaten to cancel their football tickets. NOW THAT'S DIRTY POOL.

Second.... The freakin wind was blowing like it was Northern California. 60 mile an hour gusts of wind followed us around the campus....things were blowing off of buildings and bicycles were laying around like there had been an earthquake. It felt weird and I'm FAIRLY certain that Laura regarded it as a sign from some BEAR contingent living in the hills of Oakland.

Third......THE SPRING FOOTBALL FIELD WAS COMPLETELY DESERTED.

Granted it was only lunch time and within three hours it would be a full of beautiful USC football players, coaches and fabulous media representatives, but looking out at a spring football field without a soul to be seen....is actually a rather sad moment.....for a football fan who loves USC.

For a 17 year old girl who doesn't know who John David Booty is....the moment meant nothing, except.....a big empty field.

A BIG EMPTY FIELD VS THE BAY AREA.

IT WASN'T EVEN A CONTEST.

HOW USC EVER LET PEPPERDINE BUILD THAT CAMPUS IN MALIBU IS BEYOND ME.....BUT I'M SURE IT HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH TRYING TO GET A 100.000 PEOPLE ON PCH ON A SATURDAY DURING THE FALL....wait a sec....that happens every day during the freakin summer....

So now Laura can take her new car....shown above....and peddle off to Norther California...which by the way that hybrid car gets 40,000 miles a gallon.

There are so many personal issues involved in her decision and I'm not about to rain on her parade because she knows what she wants and want she wants is good enough for me, her mother, her sisters,her aunts and uncles and of course her father. But there are some issues that need to be addressed and EVERYBODY involved needs to sit up and take notice.

BUT TODAY THE NOTICE ONLY READS

BERKELEY BABY!

GO BEARS!

I am a bit concerned about the size of the Young Republican organization at CAl....RUMOR HAS IT AS THE LARGEST SINGLE ORGANIZATION AT THE UNIVERSITY.

WHAT'S UP WITH THAT?

Oh well...when Laura drives up in her new car....that her Dad will buy her to replace the one shown above.....she will grab their attention and teach them a thing or two about politically correct behavior.

Michael Timothy McAlevey

CLARITY is fuzzy

LEXINGTON, Va., April 11 -- Sinking in polls and struggling to reinvigorate his foundering presidential campaign, Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) delivered a robust defense of the war in Iraq on Wednesday, declaring that President Bush and the conflict's supporters are on the right side of history in the struggle against terrorism and extremism.

Following up on yesterday's column....I'm still asking the same question.

WHO WILL DO WHAT TO WHOM.....IF WE LEAVE IRAQ?

BLOODBATH
CHAOS
GENOCIDE

BY WHO TOWARDS WHOM?
McCain claims that the battle is against terrorism and
extremism

EXTREMISM

E X T R E M I S M

Now we are getting down to the nitty griddy big daddy McCain.

EXTREMISM

WINNING A BATTLE AGAINST EXTREME BEHAVIOR DISPLAYED BY HUMAN BEINGS
IS
GOING
TO
TAKE......

LET'S BE HONEST HERE......

IT'S NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN

EXTREME BEHAVIOR BY HUMAN BEINGS MIGHT BE A DNA PROGRAMMED SITUATION THAT IS FUNDAMENTALLY PART OF THE STRUCTURE OF A SPECIES THAT ONLY 25,000 YEARS AGO THOUGHT THAT THE SUN REVOLVED AROUND THE EARTH....
EXCUSE ME....I MEAN 8000 YEARS AGO....WAIT A MINUTE....I MEANT TO SAY 4000 YEARS AGO.....ACTUALLY I MET SOMEONE TWO MONTHS AGO THAT STILL WASN'T SURE.....
AND THEN SINCE A LARGE PART OF THE POPULATION THINKS THAT THE UNIVERSE WAS CREATED 6000 YEARS AGO.....I WOULD HAVE TO SAY THAT EXTREMISM
MIGHT BE THE ONLY REAL FOE

I need to calm down a bit to address this situation properly

EXTREMISM is a phrase that I think is being used, by Senator McCain, in place of
RELIGIOUS FANATICISM

If that is the case.....then the reason for the war in IRAQ is to stop the spread of RELIGIOUS FANATICISM
but looking at the figures in the region I would say that the spread of EXTREMISM needs to be defined by
WHO
IS
EXTREME

If the Sunni Muslims are EXTREME than we have a problem well beyond IRAQ.

THE FOLLOWING COUNTRIES HAVE SECULAR POPULATIONS LESS THAN 5 PERCENT AND SUNNI POPULATIONS MORE THAN 70 PERCENT.

EGYPT...94% SUNNI
LIBYA....97% SUNNI
SOMALIA....98% SUNNI
ALGERIA....99% SUNNI
SUDAN.......70% SUNNI
SAUDI ARABIA.....85% SUNNI
SYRIA..........74% SUNNI
TURKEY......99%SUNNI
AFGHANISTAN......84% SUNNI
PAKISTAN.......77% SUNNI
TURKMENISTAN....87% SUNNI
UZBEKISTAN.......88% SUNNI
TAJIKISTAN.......80% SUNNI

IF THE SHI'A ARE EXTREME THAN WE ONLY HAVE A PROBLEM IN

IRAQ.......63% SHI'A
IRAN.......95% SHI'A
YEMEN....55% SHI'A

The problem is that EXTREME Behavior seems to be perpetrated by segments of both SUNNI'S AND SHI'A'S

Of course the beauty is that CHRISTIANITY hasn't displayed EXTREME behavior in a very long time.
Of course the beauty is that JUDAISM hasn't displayed EXTREME behavior in a very long time.
Of course the beauty is that HINDUISM hasn't displayed EXTREME behavior in a very long time.
Of course the beauty is that BUDDHISM hasn't displayed EXTREME behavior in a very long time.

A VERY LONG TIME for those mentioned above can range from......four months to 5000 years....depending on who looks at who.

IF WE ARE GOING TO BATTLE WITH EXTREMISM......WE NEED TO HAVE THE FACTS AND FIGURES ON WHO IS
EXTREME

And extreme behavior might be the most subjective phrase ever created because each and every person who thinks they are behaving because of A RELIGIOUS VIEWPOINT....not only doesn't regard their behavior as extreme, but instead regards their behavior as
BLESSED BY GOD

and this type of EXTREME BEHAVIOR is rampant beyond our wildest imaginations.

AND IF JOHN McCAIN SAYS THAT WE ARE BATTLING TERRORISM AND EXTREMISM......then he better define exactly who he is talking about.

WE KNOW THAT TERRORISM HAS A FACE IN OSAMA BOOB LADEN AND AN ORGANIZATION CALLED AL-QAEDA

WE KNOW THIS TO BE A FACT

Beyond this fact.....we don't know who is acting with Extreme Behavior
or do we?

ARE WE AFRAID TO MENTION THE PEOPLE INVOLVED BECAUSE THE PEOPLE INVOLVED MIGHT BE

EVERY F..KING LUNATIC ALIVE WHO THINKS THAT GOD IS ON THEIR SIDE

BIG CROWD AT THAT PARTY!

IF SOMEONE HELD A CONVENTION FOR PEOPLE WHO THOUGHT GOD WAS SUPPORTING THEIR BEHAVIOR.....NO MATTER HOW EXTREME IT MIGHT BE....THE CONVENTION CENTER WOULD HAVE TO BE THE SIZE OF......

J U P I T E R

This battle against extremism is a battle that can only be defined by

INSANITY

and the voices of reason seem to be limited to small pockets of people who either
don't believe in a Creator
OR
those of us who LOVE GOD
and don't underestimate GOD'S ability.

If someone doesn't think that GOD can handle each and every person on an individual basis than that someone is underestimating the concept of LOVE....AND THE VERY NATURE OF A BEING THAT CREATED A UNIVERSE BY THE SHEER POWER OF WILLING IT TO EXIST.

THE IDEA THAT SEPARATES US
IS
THE IDEA
THAT
ANY ORGANIZED RELIGION
HAS
THE
FINAL
SAY
ON HOW SOMEONE SHOULD BEHAVE

AND THAT SEEMS VERY EXTREME TO ME.

Senator John McCain says we are battling EXTREMISM....and he's probably absolutely correct.

NOW just tell me......who ARE the current EXTREME IDIOTS THAT NEED TO BE REIGNED IN?

SAY THEIR NAME ...JOHN
SAY THEIR ORGANIZATION ...JOHN
LET US KNOW
WE ARE LISTENING
and we are ready to kick some ass......unless of course the answer turns out to be
closer
to home.

EXTREME BEHAVIOR NEEDS TO BE ADDRESSED
but
the answer
might
not be what we
want to
hear.

I do know one thing.....it appears by looking at the statistics that THE SUNNI'S are winning the battle of the minds and hearts of the people in the MIDDLE EAST and AFRICA.

ARE THEY THE PEOPLE THAT WILL BE THE RECIPIENTS OF THE BLOODBATH, OF THE CHAOS AND A GENOCIDE....IF WE LEAVE IRAQ?

If that's the case.....then I'm thinking, by looking at the statistics, that there are enough SUNNI'S in the region to take care of the problem.

IF THE SPREAD OF MUSLIM SUNNI'S IS SOMETHING WE WANT TO CONTROL....THEN I THINK WE ARE ABOUT 400 YEARS TOO LATE.

And if the battle is really along these lines....then I think it's time we starting addressing the fact that this might really be a
HOLY WAR
AND
it's time to bring the POPE AND THE AYATOLLAH AND WHOEVER IS THE TOP DOG OF THE SUNNI'S to the UNITED NATIONS and let's have a
COUNCIL OF FAITH

I WANT TO HEAR THE REASONS WHY EVERYBODY IS SO F..KING PISSED OFF.....SO THAT I CAN STOP BEING SO F..KING PISSED OFF.

HAVE A F..KING NICE DAY

IS THAT A LITTLE TOO EXTREME?

MICHAEL TIMOTHY MC ALEVEY