Nothing like good news

During a special session of Congress yesterday all members announced that they would give up their health insurance program and start all over just like every American seeking an affordable plan. They also announced that their vacation time would be reduced to two weeks just like every other American worker, and that they would start paying for any personal traveling and their lunches.

The President, in response to their gestures, apologized for staying in Afghanistan after the death of Osama Bin Laden. He also announced that he would use half of his campaign money to help hungry children in America.

Chevron as gesture of good will, in response to the President and Congress, said they were going to spend half of their 2011 profits on building Solar plants outside of Los Angeles that would basically cover power for 14 million homes.

Edison and The DWP thanked them and then declared bankruptcy.

Magic Johnson was so elated that he put together a special group and bought Royal Dutch Shell, Disneyland, Six-Flags and the Safeway Corporation. He then said he wasn't finished and that he knew the personal cure for HIV but didn't want to share it until after he owned the Earth. He did say that the medication he was taking really worked, but it did make him a shopaholic.

Skateboarder Tom Schaar, 12, makes history with first-ever 1080 www.grindtv.com
Tom Schaar has shown remarkable promise as a skateboarder but few expected a 12-year-old to become the first in the sport to land a 1080. On Monday, however, the kid made history by soaring above a 27-foot quarterpipe wall, spinning three full rotations and landing with his board still underfoot. (F...

Seriously......I think that's a true story but I'm also aware of trick photography. The dude's from Malibu so check it out.

This used to be my favorite holiday until the Internet came along. Now it's really hard to play jokes on people unless they are really mean jokes and when someone gets hurt that isn't very funny.....unless it's really really funny......which is really really sick.

I think I'll make some early morning phone calls just to get the day started.

I wished I had thought of this idea about two hours ago.

Oh well.....is that your phone ringing?

Michael Timothy McAlevey