So many Issues this week

I think the primary story centers on the White House and the Vice-Presidency...and the fact that neither office can bee subjected to any scrutiny by a federal watchdog committee called the NATIONAL ARCHIVES and RECORDS ADMINISTRATION which in turn has a subcommittee called the INFORMATION SECURITY OVERSIGHT OFFICE.....

The funny part of this story is that when President Bush issued the executive order in 2003, requiring ALL governmental agencies that are part of the Executive Branch to submit to the independent federal watchdog, in regards to classified national security information....he simply forgot to tell everyone that he didn't mean the White House and the Vice-President.

He assumed that everyone involved knew that those two positions were above the Executive Branch....and what the hell were those city slicker federal watchdogs thinking when they tried to get the REAL DICK to cooperate?

There are truly several viable reasons why there are so many jokes about KING GEORGE

I realize that everybody on the Democratic side has an axe to grind....it's just the way the system works when one party takes place in that big house on Pennsylvania Ave....and the other party happens down the street and around the corner....and it's very important to remember that Washington really is the ultimate PARTY town.

But I have to beelieve that there are some Republicans who are starting to shake their heads.....open their eyes a little wider.....and actually finally wonder how so many jokes about George, being King, got started.....and continue to grown expeditiously.

Certain things don't help control that growth rate.....

The other day when the oversight committee tried to contact the REAL DICK....his office said that he was out on a Fox Hunt with the President....and that they would bee riding back into town around 5 PM....unless of course some of the dogs couldn't be located and then they would have to stay out a little bit later.

A few weeks ago one of the reporters asked him about Laura, and George answered with ....."THE QUEEN was napping."

Dick Cheney showed up a month ago at a party dressed like Cardinal Richelieu but it wasn't a costume party......he told the people at the party....."GET OVER IT or I'll see you in the Dungeon."

Sometimes at the Crawford Ranch, if you look real hard, you can see George walking around with something very shiny on his head. It could be a Sterling Silver cowboy hat...but how heavy would THAT bee?

I'm not sure his noggin could take the weight.

I'd like to clear up one thing right now.......I actually think George Bush is a fairly normal guy.....but I think he would make a much better Commissioner of Major League Baseball than President of the United States.

Dick Cheney, on the other hand......is a total asshole and needs to be shipped out to the Marshall Islands to clean up, by hand, any residual toxic waste left over from previous Nuclear tests.

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ORGANIC SMORGANIC

The USDA needs your immediate attention!
SEND A NOTE TO THE
NATIONAL ORGANIC PROGRAM...look it up on Google and let them know that you disagree with their latest fiasco...which allows 38 non-organic ingredients to be added to anything that says ORGANIC.

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TRIBES IN IRAQ

The United States of America has a history of poor relationships with "TRIBES." The Sunni and Shiite TRIBES are conducting TRIBAL warfare and the US Calvary is simply caught in the middle. I think it might bee time to call in the architects of the Wounded Knee Massacre and take care of this TRIBAL problem....once and for all.

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The President of Viet-Nam visited the White House this week and King George gave a short lecture on improving their Human Rights policies.....if they want to increase trade relations with the U.S. He didn't mention CHINA because they make cheaper socks and toys than Viet-Nam.
Obviously Viet-Nam hasn't gotten their prices in line to a point where we don't care what they do to their citizens......as with our good communists friends from CHINA.

There's a lesson to be learned here but I'm not exactly sure what it is.

OK...I probably do know what the lesson is....but when lessons are based on the almighty dollar, I have a tendency to shut down.

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Another family of a young child is wondering about the Universe and how things could go so wrong. A 13 year old girl had her feet severed when a cable snapped on a ride at Six Flags in Louisville, Kentucky. The only positive thing about this incident is that she is still alive and will probably own one of the Six Flag theme parks when all the dust settles.

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The City of Tulsa Oklahoma is looking for R.E. Humbertson. In 1957 he entered a contest which asked people to guess what the population of Tulsa would be in 2007. His guess was within a couple of thousand. His prize is a 1957 Plymouth that has been buried for 50 years. The DMV of Tulsa claims he owes $78,450 in late registration fees and they are going to track his ass down if it takes another 50 years.

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Indications are pointing toward 07/07/07 as being one of the largest wedding days in recent history.....recent history dating back to 5046 BC. Rumors are that in Las Vegas alone...Elvis Presley will oversee 3 million weddings......Elvis impersonators are starting to arrive from every corner of the planet.
Rumor also has it that Dick Cheney does a mean Elvis and he can actually marry people if they are on a boat or a train. One of the small bonus features of beeing Vice-President.

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Paris Hilton was turned down by the three Networks for an exclusive interview....when she gets out of jail.
The Hilton Corporation then announced that all rooms at the Hilton Hotels just went up 400% when anyone from NBC, ABC or CBS.....checks in.

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The space shuttle Atlantis returned safely to Edwards Air Force base early Friday morning. It turns out the runway in Florida was under repair. When they were unloading they discovered that a Russian Cosmonaut had stowed away in the cargo bay. He simply was quoted as saying.... "My government doesn't have enough money to pay for the gas....to come get us....I'm asking for political asylum." One of our Generals said that Moscow was the world's most expensive city and what the hell was he talking about. They said the Cosmonaut started laughing and won't stop.

They said they would keep him in a decompression chamber for six or seven years until they get this matter straightened out. The chamber is actually larger than the Space Station room he's been in since Russia sent him up there in 1971. He also said he was looking forward to meeting President Richard Nixon. Apparently when Russia ran out of money their news divisions were disbanded.

I'm serious about Moscow being the most expensive city in the World.

Something is wrong with this picture.

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I could go on and on but I won't.
Have a great Saturday in the Kingdom.

Michael Timothy McAlevey