Merry Christmas minus one

Remembering and forgetting can be tricky roads to travel.

Obviously there are reasons that we try to forget certain things that have happened in our lives and often times the trying to forget....actually works.....for awhile.

It's easier for some than it is for others.

The young have a built in excuse because memories from childhood have a way of fogging over reality.....and it's a fog that hopefully allows for happy and prosperous adult lives of their own.

It wouldn't be fair if children remembered tragedy the same way as adults. Unfortunately we look around society and see that tragic events in youth do linger and adult bad guys are created. That is usually tied to a lack of love within the immediate social circle of that individual bad guy.

WIthin our immediate social circle we have no bad guys. We have loving people who care about what happens to each other even though sometimes we wonder what they were thinking when they did this or that.

Everybody that I know has a life and forgetting certain tragic things is a buffer for being able to build a future of purpose and...........hopefully........harmony.

But then there's the few of us who can't forget no matter how hard we might try.

And then there's the fewer of us who don't want to forget because we have no choice.

Fortunately within our immediate social circle there are only a couple of people who fall into that category in reference to the loss of Sean Maximilian McAlevey's physical reality.

Of that very few.....I am one.

And it's my duty and responsibility as Sean's father to make sure that there is something or somewhere that his name will always be visible.

For 16 years I've been derelict in my responsibility. I have seen golf tournaments, scholarships, restaurants, university buildings and stars named after lost children but I've never been able to reconcile exactly what to do.

Last week I went out to do my Christmas shopping and because of what I've been undertaking in the last few years regarding my artwork....I had very little to work with regarding the almighty ingredient known as......COIN.

I was perplexed and decided to go down to Palisades Park and make a list of what each and every person I knew might like from the 79 cent store.

I sat down on one of the benches and realized that right underneath me was the answer to both Christmas and Sean. The odd part is I probably first had this idea about six years ago and just figured I would do it later when I had the money.

I decided at that moment to take the limited funds I had for Christmas and start a personal account that would allow me to purchase a bench and a plaque with Sean's name and to list

all the people that that were his immediate earth team, Kerry, Lily, Laura, Grace, Steve, Kelly, Jack, Robert, Katie, Dixie and David along with his deceased Great Grandparents Frank and Noma..........as the donors. Of course I will also include my brother Jerry and Grandpa Bill and my mom just because it's the proper thing to do.

Sean was a Santa Monica kid and having a bench overlooking the Santa Monica Bay with his name underneath is just about the best way I can think of saying.....

Merry Christmas